My mother thinks she still owns a house that she no longer does. She's making us crazy wanting to move back. What to do?

Yeah, just giving her house away could be considered financial exploitation of a vulnerable senior, elder abuse and who knows what else.

You should definitely consult with an attorney.

If she couldn't live alone, she probably didn't have the mental capacity to give her house away.

Shasta99, please let us know that the house was actually sold at fair market value and not just given away.

If it was given away, as others had mentioned, there will be a major roadblock for when the time comes that your Mother may need to depend on Medicaid [which is different from Medicare] to pay for her stay at a facility.

Curious, who's idea was it to sell or give away the house?

First thing I thought was handing over that house was a no no. First because of the Medicaid look back and second because that was an asset. The proceeds from that house could have paid for an AL or MC.

We found her the best that she could afford. A very nice place staff great. Activities but Mom won't participate. Sits in her room all day reading and watching tv. Pleasant to everyone but me. My only brother died abt 7 years ago so it's his daughter and I fronting the care. Mom's retirement and social security cover it for now.

Ditto to what MACinCT pointed out about losing Medicaid qualification. Please consult with a Medicaid Planner or elder law/estate planning attorney to make sure you've not impacted your mom's ability to have this resource. It will be worth the investment to talk to a professional who knows the facts in her state.

A goal with dementia is to keep the LO calm since they are less and less able to bring themselves into this state of mind due to the diminishing ability to use reason and logic. Instead of have Groundhog Day everytime she asks, try giving her a brief answer, like, "Your doctor says you can return when you can perform all your ADLs so you can be safe" and then immediately redirect the conversation. If she follows up on this response tell her you'll call the doctor tomorrow (if she requests this). Then of course, you don't do this. Keep redirecting the conversation. We do this with my 87-yr old MIL in LTC and she can't get mad at us since it's the "doctor" who makes the decision (even though she's bedridden and hasn't walked on her own in years, she insists she can. We say, "Great! Show the doctor tomorrow that you can walk, and do all the other required activities." She acts miffed but it diffuses the situation.

If there are any activities in your LO's facility, accompany her to one so that she's occupied during your visit, then leave before the activity ends so her mind doesn't have the chance to focus on the house.