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We don't ask her to pay anything. She is in her right mind so she isn't going crazy. She has run off all my kids out of my house but insist on having her so called family there whenever she wants. She says that her only family is my brother and his 2 kids. Which hurts my feelings. What can I do about putting her in a nursing home or getting her out of my house? I hate to do it but I can't loose my marriage too. Please help.

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Take freeloading Mom to your brother's house and drop her off. She says herself "that's her only family."

She will never leave her FREE setup at your house unless she is forced. Since she pays Brother's bills and doesn't give you money for rent or food, that's the logical solution.

Change the locks afterwards too.
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Reply to Dawn88
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You've got to be kidding me.

The second ANYONE tried to "run" my kids out of MY house would be the second I would tell that person to pack their bags and get the he** out. Immediately!

Tell mom to get out. If she's "in her right mind", then she should have NO problem fending for herself!

You don't want to be the "bad" guy, but that's what it is going to take. Why on Earth do you think mom will leave voluntarily when you are covering all of her expenses AND taking her B.S. to boot? Tell mom she has a choice - move out or start paying you $5,000 per month in rent. Make it so uncomfortable for her that SHE looks to leave. Don't do ANYTHING for her - not a meal, or a load of laundry, and tell her under NO circumstances is your brother and his kids allowed in YOUR home.

It seems to me that mom needs you way, way more than you need her; it's time to make her aware of the fact that her behavior has driven you to do this.

It's NOT your responsibility to get mom into a nursing home if she, indeed, is in her right mind. Let HER figure it out.
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Reply to notgoodenough
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Decide today that you deserve better. Decide you deserve your children in your home, not to be talked badly about, and to have peace within your marriage. Time for mom to leave by whatever means possible, you can pack up her stuff and take her to your brother’s home, legally evict her, or move her to a place with professional care, whichever is best for you. Don’t discuss any of it with her, it won’t help. I wish you courage and peace
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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How sad that you allowed your mother to run your own children out of your/their home. She's the one who needs to be run out, so perhaps you may have to start the eviction process through the sheriffs office to get her out.
And give her a notice of one month to find a new place to live since you say she's in her right mind. Or just let your brother know that you'll be dropping her off at his house with all her belongings at the end of the month, and he can deal with her since he's her "favorite."
You deserve to live in peace in your own home, so moms got to go ASAP.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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Just kick her out. Why is this even a question? She is in her right mind and she has money to pay your brother's bills, so she can take her money and move in with him or out on her own. Tell her she has until March 1st, which is a Sunday, to find a place to live. Have a locksmith scheduled for March 2nd, which is a Monday, and change the locks. If she and/or her stuff are still in your house, put everything of hers out in the yard or driveway. Call your brother and his children and tell them to come pick her up.

Why would you prioritize this woman over your husband and children? Enough is enough. Live your life in peace with your own family.
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Reply to MG8522
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WHHHHHY do you do this to yourself?? WHY?
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Reply to southernwave
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Hothouseflower Feb 16, 2026
That's a good question and one that I ask myself constantly because of all I did for my family as I think abut the last miserable six years of my life and how I was treated during that time. My answer is that I was foolish.

I hope the OP stops being a victim and moves on. I really wish I had.
(3)
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Okay, she has run off your children in your own home? Yet, she still occupies your home and her favorite family members are allowed to visit instead? Focus on this.

Listen to the advice of these wise people here.
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Reply to Scampie1
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The easiest way, but not the quickest way, is to wait until mom has a medical event that requires hospitalization. Then tell the hospital that she cannot come back to your home, and set up an AL facility for her to go to. She will not like it, but that is not your problem.
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Reply to olddude
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This reminds me of my mom declaring that her family was the most important ever and by that she meant her siblings and their kids. But it wasn't any of her siblings that took my grandmother in when she got old. Mom was stuck. Time to let your mom know she has a deadline to move out. Apologize to your kids and get therapy. It's time to start healing.
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Reply to JustAnon
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File for eviction. Cut out your cable and internet.
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Reply to PeggySue2020
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