My mother is under hospice care in her nursing home. I want to bring her home for her final days/weeks. Is this realistic?



Tina I'm sorry you're going through this. Do what you think would be best for your mom. If she stays and passes in the NH, know that they would want her removed in less than 24 hours. 
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Reply to shad250

If you are picturing around the clock support from a hospice provider you won't find it, are you prepared to do this on your own - feeding, bathing, toileting, medication, re-positioning and all the rest? I know of a family who did this, but two of her daughters were RNs and they still had to hire a care provider from out of the area where they lived to find service providers that could give them the kind of support they needed.
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Reply to cwillie

Has someone told you that your mother has only days/weeks to live?

How will you transport her? Once my mom was given days to live, transporting her anywhere would have been cruel. In fact, we turned down Hospices fancy air mattress because she already had one and getting her out of bed would have caused pain and possibly agitation.

Who will care for her at home? Does she or you have the resources to fund 24/7 care. She will need to be repositioned every 2 hoirs.

Are you able to administer morphine? I don't think I would have been able to muster the courage to do that.

You need to weigh the benefits against the downside. I'm so sorry you have to make this painful choice.
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn

Tinabeck, so sorry about your Mother. As to whether she can come home for her final days, you may want to ask your Mom's nursing home doctor is he/she thinks that is a good idea.

As for it being realistic, it depends on your Mom's Alzheimer's/dementia [per your profile] and what type of care she needed. Hospice can order a hospital bed and other equipment that your Mom may need. Is the family ready to do around the clock care?
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Reply to freqflyer


I had these same thoughts when I would visit my Mom toward the last months of her life. She was so tiny, helpless, and to me seemed lost.

My husband gave me his opinion which helped a lot. Hubby pointed out to me that Mom had long forgotten my home, who I was, and If I brought Mom to our home how could I hold up for any length of time.

Hubby pointed out that Mom was being well taken care of by NH staff and Hospice in a familiar environment. Hubby asked if I was considering this decision based on what was best for Mom or my emotions that occurred when I visited Mom.

In my case Hubby was right. I hate when that happens. ;)
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Reply to lizzywho61