She will not agree to move to where we live or where her oldest grandson lives, nor will she move into a retirement community in the city where she lives now. Now she has scheduled cataract surgery and wants my husband and me to come down to help her out. Her house reeks of mildew (I have posted about this previously), and we don't want to stay there so we would have to be in a hotel. Also, the weather could be a problem. We don't want to risk our necks on icy roads or end up stuck there for days on end. I'm really angry that she expects us to do this and stubbornly refuses to move out of her huge old house that is too big for her, needs constant repair, and eats up a lot of her money. I will feel guilty if we don't go, but I don't want to go. How can we convince her that it's time to move out of the house and either closer to us or into a retirement community? She is 87 years old.