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She has sworn off all conventional medicine in pursuit of charlatans offers of neuropathy cure in expensive and numerous stem cell treatments at a "non medical" facility.


My MIL is as vulnerable as she is stubborn. I see that her balance is off (falls often in the home) and that she can't feel her legs/feet from the knees down. She should not be driving. She needs medical diagnosis so treatment can be sought. We are frustrated that she will not care for herself and get help. No one of the children lives in the same town, and she lies about things like the car accidents she has had and the falling in the home. We're pulling our hair out with what to do next. We even thought to write to the DMV and report an impaired driver to get her attention and force the hand of going to the doctor. But that was not dignified and at moment we are not heading that route. But I feel this is the equivalent of handing car keys to a drunk person...totally irresponsible...

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If she refuses care, Ok, she can make all the bad choices she wants..but she absolutely MUST STOP DRIVING. My mother has no strength in her legs, can barely stand. but insisted on driving. It requires a bit of strength to hit the brakes HARD and that happens all the time!

Neuropathy is very hard to treat. There are so many devices, sole inserts, braces, orthotics--and in the end, the neuropathy will win. I think keeping as active as possible is the best thing--that and taking care of your feet and toes. You cannot feel them and a small 'bump' that you feel could be serious.

Mother fought us on the driving. Brother took her out to the car (after her hip replacement) and said "Show me how you're going to make this happen". She couldn't even get the walker in the car, much less herself.

It is hard to watch that little bit of independence be taken away, but we have to step up and be the toughies sometimes.
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Reply to Midkid58
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I tell my father that the way to keep his medical insurance is that he must go to the doctor at least once a year to have a medical check up. While we were there this last time he complained to the doctor that I took his license away. The doctor backed me up and said that "it was a great thing that our children can take care of us old people and drive us to our appointments and we can sit in the car and enjoy looking at the sites".
So I tell you get her to the doctor on a technicality - like for insurance reasons and talk to the doctor before hand let them know what is going on.
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Reply to hgnhgn
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There is no cure for neuropathy. The nerves are damaged and according to my Mom neurologist, it would take two or three years to come back. Your MIL has diabetes (my Mom didn't) and this probably the reason for her neuropathy. Moms was in her ankles and feet and her dr recommended no driving. I think the DMV would require a doctors note to suspend her license.

She needs to be using a walker but I see a wheelchair in her future. There will come a time when she will break something. Then she can go to the hospital and while there have her evaluated. You can then have her PCP report her to DMV.

As said, if she is competent, then she can make her own decisions.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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THANK YOU!
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Reply to LCL864
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You owe it to the walking and driving public to report her to DMV.

With regard to all else, unless she has been declared incompetent, she can make all the bad decisions she wants to.

You don't have to enable them.
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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