My mother has dementia and Parkinson's disease. Her husband walked out on her. Where do I go from here? - AgingCare.com

My mother has dementia and Parkinson's disease. Her husband walked out on her. Where do I go from here?

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After 29 years of marriage, her husband packed his things and left her. I am my mother's power of attorney.

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I sure hope so jeannegibbs thou there are times I doubt myself, and pray I'm making the correct decisions on my mothers behalf. Thank You
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Wow! It sure sounds like you have the situation well in hand.
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Thank you all so much for the feed back. To update a little My mothers husband did empty out all her savings, and yes I have closed her checking and opened up a new one, talked to her lawyers who did her will and trust and they are helping with family lawyer so we can file for divorce, my oldest daughter who is not married nor has children has willingly moved in with my mother to care for her so that we may keep her home, we have been to the docs updated and refilled all meds and even took a trip to the dentist for a cleaning. I m hoping I've covered all bases but if any of you can think of something else, I'm all ears !! Thank you all!! much appreciated.
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Check on your moms meds and prescriptions and with her doctors. Make sure her insurance is paid up. Remember there are usually three. Medicare, her supplement and the prescription plan. As her POA you may have already been taking care of those And other things for her. Check her utilities and any other ongoing expenses with her home and lawn. Car insurance and maintenance if she owns one. I suppose you should also get an attorney for any divorce or separation agreement or as Jeanie mentioned, an abandonment issue. Hopefully your mom is not too upset with his leaving. I'm sure she will miss him regardless. Take care of yourself along with her. Check her will and see if she is cognizant enough to update it. Come back often for any support we may offer. Hugs. 
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After Mom is safely being cared for, if her husband has cleaned out their bank accounts see a lawyer. He can legally take out all the money if his name is on the account, but he cannot legally abandon a disabled spouse. He may need to make monthly contributions to her upkeep.
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Barb's right. The immediate concern is your mom's safety and well-being. After you get that squared away, as your mom's POA, check her bank accounts. Did the husband walk away with any money? How is your mom situated financially? Did she and her husband share any accounts? Close her accounts and open new ones with you on the account with your mom.
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Is anyone with your mom right now?

Aside from getting her immediate care needs seen to ( perhaps getting her into an AL or NH for respite care), she needs a professional needs assessment.

Call the Area Agency on Aging in her locality and ask for someone to come out and assess her. When you have a clear idea of what her level of need is, you can move forward with placement.

Are you in contact with her doctors?  They may also have a good idea of what level of care she needs.
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