I’m so sorry to hear of your mother’s passing. She is finally with your dad now - she’s waited long enough. Let their love and your memories of them help you get through this very difficult time. God Bless.
Marcy I am so sorry to hear that your Mom has died. I am so grateful you were both with her and she had such good care. This had to be a difficult Thanksgiving for you. I hope you will come soon to be able to celebrate the joy and love of her time with you.
My mom was alert and responsive for 8 days. The hospice felt that her bleed had slowed down, and talked about her returning to nursing home care. On Sunday evening, she was experiencing pain. I was called at 5:30 am Monday, when I arrived, she opened her eyes and indicated with a head nod that she knew that I was there with her. My sister arrived an hour later. Mom was sleeping. We decided to manage pain more aggressively. Mom was given meds to ease her pain, and she slumbered for a day and a half. She passed peacefully as my sister and I sung to her songs that both she and dad loved.
Hospice sounds best for her. You are being realistic and that's good. It's sad when this occurs during the holidays--daddy died on NY's day--but he made it through Christmas, so we wouldn't always associate Christmas with his passing.
You asked what you can expect? Well, likely more strokes or mini-bleeds. Doubtful she'll come back to where she was before the stroke.
Just love her and let her know you're OK to be without her and she can go home to your dad.
Hi, I am sitting here in mom’s hospice room. It is 5:35 am. Mom took a tun for the worse yesterday morning. It was just nine days after her cerebral hemorrhage. She is totally unresponsive. She has the good drugs and is comfortable now. My sister and I are here with her. Thank you for all of your kind responses.
Mom is in hospice. She was approved before getting discharged from the hospital. Mom refuses any rehab or care, she wants to just see what happens. She asked to go back to the long term care facility that she was previously in. She needs an evaluation and a covid test in order to go back.
Was your Mom strong before this bleed? Basically this is like a stroke, in that you will know more about Mom's chances in a month when the bleed is gone and the pressure more off centers of the brain. Whatever isn't "back" easily within a month will take a lot of fight to relearn, the walking and etc. Is Mom able to swallow? You say she is intact cognitively. If so this is time to discuss with her Doctor and with Mom how hard she wants to fight going forward. Would she want palliative care or aggressive care and rehab. Everyone is different in what they want. You may see in this coming month either a lot of dramatic improvement or a lot of dramatic deterioration. Meanwhile SNF or Rehab may give time to see where this is going. Be guided by the doctors. They should be able to read the scans to give you a better idea of how to move forward. Everyone is different. I myself would be glad to bank up in bed with the "good meds" at 91, and peacefully go to my rest. Some seniors, like my Mom by her history, don't care to go anywhere. She told me she still had her book half read (The Things they Carried; still remember it sitting, her glasses on top of it, unfinished).
Mom has been waiting to go since my Dad passed in 2012. Mom said she just wants to follow him. She can talk, seems a bit confused at times. She has been exhibiting some pretty bizarre behaviors though. She will tell me that she can’t lift her arm on her left side. She will do it when prompted by a nurse, there is a little less strength. My Dad died quickly of a similar stroke, I think she may be mimicking some of his symptoms. I’m not sure. I live in Maine as does Mom. Her favorite child is waiting to get a covid test so she can visit. I’m interested in seeing how she is then.
You asked what you can expect? Well, likely more strokes or mini-bleeds. Doubtful she'll come back to where she was before the stroke.
Just love her and let her know you're OK to be without her and she can go home to your dad.
Bless you during this difficult time.
Did her doctor say what the alternative to hospice would be?
You don’t want your mom to suffer and hospice will keep her comfortable.
I am so sorry you and your mom are faced with this medical and emotional dilemma.
Keep in touch if you wish to speak further.
Best wishes to you and your family.
Mom refuses any rehab or care, she wants to just see what happens. She asked to go back to the long term care facility that she was previously in. She needs an evaluation and a covid test in order to go back.
Is Mom able to swallow?
You say she is intact cognitively. If so this is time to discuss with her Doctor and with Mom how hard she wants to fight going forward. Would she want palliative care or aggressive care and rehab. Everyone is different in what they want.
You may see in this coming month either a lot of dramatic improvement or a lot of dramatic deterioration. Meanwhile SNF or Rehab may give time to see where this is going.
Be guided by the doctors. They should be able to read the scans to give you a better idea of how to move forward.
Everyone is different. I myself would be glad to bank up in bed with the "good meds" at 91, and peacefully go to my rest. Some seniors, like my Mom by her history, don't care to go anywhere. She told me she still had her book half read (The Things they Carried; still remember it sitting, her glasses on top of it, unfinished).