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My mother was 98. I cared for her for more than ten years. All this is crippling. On top of it all my brother didn't wait one day, on the very day of the funeral he started talking about his plans to clear out and sell the house mom and I lived in for all these years. He never cared for her for one day. I am filled with sorrow, guilt, and now anger.

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I'm sorry for your loss. My advice is do not make any major decisions for at least a year for you will be thinking clearer then.
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Reply to cmagnum
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Martha...you are not a meek mouse!!! First of all, this is YOUR HOUSE NOW...you are protected since you have lived in AND cared for Mom for at least the past 2 years. Medicaid, if she was on it, is not allowed to take this asset away from you. Protect yourself and tough as it might be, separate yourself from selfish brother who is trying to not only make you homeless, but get $$$$ from sale of house. See an elder law attorney ASAP....but you are NOT NOW or EVER selling the house...unless YOU want to. You live there as long as you want!!! Be strong...as I know you are...brother didn’t help you up until now...& only sees $$$ for himself. I’m so sorry you are going through this. Do not even speak to him, as he will only try & bully you & boss you around. He’s NOT your boss. Hugs 🤗 hugs 🤗 hugs 🤗
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Reply to CaregiverL
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marthamouse Jun 22, 2019
Thank you for the words of encouragement. I am avoiding my brother since the funeral, and will do so until I see Mom's attorney next week. And thank you for the hugs!
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marthamouse, I'm sorry for the loss of your mother and I empathize with the anger toward your brother. I lost my 97-year-old dad 3 months ago after having difficulty for years with some of my 7 siblings, but nothing compared to your brother's comments on the day of your mother's funeral. Now that a few days have gone by, if you can, try talking to him about what he said and what he now intends to do -- maybe he'll realize his mistaken intentions stated in haste and perhaps in grief. In any event, you probably should plan on getting an attorney as previously suggested. It's hard, but I hope things will get easier for you as the months pass -- life does go on. Best wishes.
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Reply to bicycler
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Sorry for your loss. It may take a while to get used to having time on your hands and not being a caregiver. Its an adjustment. Mom lived to be 98. Nice long life.

Who is Executor? Because nothing can be done until the estate is probated. I agree, u may want to get a lawyer to protect ur interest since the home has been urs too.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Get with an attorney right away, this is your home and hopefully there are laws to protect you from him just doing this. He can't understand how you feel, he didn't sacrifice himself for her care for 10 years, but someone needs to put the breaks on his actions.

I am sorry for your loss, one day at a time. After 10 years it will take time for you to find your new normal.

Hugs!
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal
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I am so sorry for your loss. I'm afraid I have no direct experience of this - either caring or losing a beloved parent - so I am not well-placed to give you any advice but I am sure there are others on here who will have words of wisdom for you, I hope you have friends and other family members that you can talk to. Take care of yourself.
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Reply to hellymart
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