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I am so sorry. You and your beloved mother are in my prayers.
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jrock - I'm so sorry for you and for your mother. I wish you had had better news too. Be comforted that you have done everything you could for her and I know you'll continue to do so as you help her through this last phase of her life. We are all sending our thoughts and prayers for comfort for you and your mother.
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Jrock, I think I understand how you feel … sort of in shock? … you never expected things to develop this way. I’ve been there. Three years ago, I took a redeye flight from Los Angeles to Boston for one of my quarterly visits to my elderly parents. My aunt had to pick me up, because my father had diarrhea. Sitting across the breakfast table, I discovered that his skin was yellow … he’d had abdominal pain for about three weeks and pale stools, but hadn’t told me. He also hadn’t told me that my mother’s dementia was radically worse than it had been the last time I’d visited, just a few months previously. We took my father to the ER, he had a CT scan, and the ER doctor bluntly informed us that he had an inoperable mass near his gall bladder … essentially terminal. They attempted to put a stent into his bile duct, but that didn’t work. His kidneys failed, then he developed pneumonia. He died a week after I arrived … peacefully, he wasn’t afraid, perhaps because I was able to get a priest to come visit him. Suddenly I was making funeral arrangements and having to support a 92-year-old mother who had suddenly lost her husband of 65 years and couldn’t be left alone for more than a half hour or so. While 2500 miles away from my home and my husband. My parents’ friends from the town Senior Center were very supportive, as were my aunt and some cousins I hardly knew, and the lovely people at the funeral home. I don’t have any siblings. I think I was in a sort of shock for weeks. Yet somehow, in a way, what got me through is that it is the way of things that children bury their parents, it's nature … my father was 91 and had been in pain from arthritis for years, and dealing with my mother’s growing anger issues and confusion had badly worn him down. He had, we all hope, gone to a place of peace. Bless you, and hang in there.
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Jrock, I am so sorry. I imagine your mother was in a lot of pain and did not want you to know. I am glad you have her pain relief now. That will help her more than you will know. Praying for you both!
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Big hugs jrock...
❤️peace ❤️strength ❤️courage❤️
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JRock I'm so sorry to hear of your Mom's devastating diagnosis! I know just how you feel, as my husband and I just went through end of life care and Hospice for my FIL, who had lung cancer, and passed in our home this last September.

The new hits you like a knife to the heart, but do know that you are doing everything you can to make her end of life care and passing as comfortable and gentle as possible.

We found Hospice to be a Godsend, and the Caregivers were incredible!

It's time now for you to let them do the hard work of taking care of her, and you can step back into the role of Loving Daughter. Visit often, bring in treats that are allowed, and just Love on her. I know this is a sad sad time, but you can do this, but make sure that you get plenty of rest too, as it's been an exhausting few weeks, while you tried to honor her wishes, but it would have been near impossible for you to have done it on your own, without a great deal of help. It would probably be a good time to see your own Dr, for support and possibly a Rx for anxiety.

Your Mom is in good hands now, so try to find support from friends and family, you don't need to go through this alone. Your AC friends are right here to support you through this journey! I am so sorry about all this!

I also lost my own Mom to Cancer, and the news is so shocking and painful. You take care, and please come back and let us know how you and your Mom are doing! Again, so sorry Sweetie! Cancer Sucks!
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BarbBrooklyn thank you so much for your prayers and support. sending you a huge hug. you are wonderful
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Jrock--
Prayers for you.

So sorry for the brutal dx....but in the end, when it's all over, you will be grateful your mom had a peaceful passing. Hospice will guide you through this.
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Jrock, we are here if you need to talk. I would not have gotten through my mom's death 4 months ago without the folks here. Be well, and (((((((hugs)))))))).
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Rock,adding my prayers to everyon else's. When you first posted your question I knew the outcome would not be good but it was so important for you to get her to the hospital.
You would have been even more devastated if she had suddenly died at home and would have forever blamed yourself for not getting her help sooner.
You did all the right things. When she began to show the symptoms it was long past time when anything could have been done to save her. I imagine there were lots of things in the past few weeks she had been feeling but did not want to worry you.
This is going to be hard it always is but be comforted that she is pain free and getting the best possible care right now. As others have said take care of yourself and just be there for her. It is not unusual for a loved one to wait till they are alone before they pass so if that happens don't feel guilty about that Mom wanted it that way. Many hugs
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JRock... The most important time in caring for your
Mom is right now. Glad you have the help from hospice.
Please know how much we care for you and your
Mom. Please stay with us, posting as time allows.
When we share we all gain invaluable knowledge.
Blessings to you and yours. Hugs!
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JRock, I'm so sorry to hear the bad news about your Mom. It is so good you got her the care she needed, and that she will be without pain. Make sure you take care of yourself along the way!
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So sorry for Mom but glad u finally found out was going on. She will pass peacefully.
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Jrock, I went through this in May with my mom. The breathing episodes you mentioned are called Cheyne-Stokes breathing, as the hospice nurse explained to me. Hospice will take good care of your mom and keep her pain and anxiety free. I'm thinking of you as you go through this. You have our support and we understand what you're experiencing. {{{Hugs}}}
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Hello everyone. I can’t thank you enough for your love, prayers, support, words of comfort and hugs of love. You all played a role in bringing me peace and comfort during this difficult time.
I am sad to announce that my mom passed away yesterday morning peacefully at hospice.
I am in extreme pain, shock and grief. Fortunately I have my animals and husband to help me.
Prayers and love to you all 💕
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Jrock, I am so sorry for your loss. But I'm glad your mom had a peaceful passing. Thoughts of support and comfort are coming your way. {{{Hugs}}}
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Jrock, (((((hugs)))))))
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I'm so sorry for your loss, Jrock. Wishing you comfort, knowing that your mother is at peace.
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Jrock--
I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for coming back here to update us.

Your mom is at peace and without pain. Take comfort in that.
((Hugs))
Liz
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Jrock, so sorry to hear this. I hope good memories from the past comfort you at this time and that you are surrounded with love and peace.
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I'm sorry for the passing of your mom but you'll have her in your heart always. No more pain or sickness. Remember the good times as she would want you to do.
((((Big hugs)))) in this real difficult time.
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JRock, oh I am so sorry for you and the loss of your sweet Mom, I'm so glad that you got her the help she (and you) needed, to give her a peaceful end.
Losing a parent is the most difficult thing we ever go through, so I am sending you my Love and Prayers, as you get through this emotional time.

It does get better, especially knowing that you did everything possible to give her a peaceful passing, and once the funereal and burial arrangements are completed, give yourself a couple of days to really rest up, remember that you don't need to hurry through this process, be kind to yourself now. I hope that Hospice was good for you both.

I will keep you in my prayer's, now and in the future, as this is life altering, and only time will make things better moving forward in your life. I'm glad you have your husband there for support. You take care, and remember that you can continue to come here for grief support!! Love, Stace
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Jrock,
So sorry for your loss. Hope you are able to get some rest in the days ahead

God bless
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JRock, I am glad you took action and gave your mother the opportunity for a peaceful passing. She tried to protect you from her pain, and in the end, you were the one who was able to help her with it. So sweet! God bless you and may you recover from this loss.
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JRock, sorry for your loss. Please be mindful of yourself
during the difficult time ahe ad. Don't forget about us.
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Aww, so sorry, peace and love JRock
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I'm sorry for the passing of your mom, jrock
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So sorry for the loss of your beloved mom.
She is at peace now, no more suffering or pain.
I hope that you know you were a wonderful daughter & did the best you could. Knowing this will help to comfort you as you cope with your loss.
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She needs to go 911 stat to the ED whether she wants to or not
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