My mom never took care of her own parents when they got older, living till nearly 100. She was *busy at home. Yet she expected me to take care if her when she got older..in her 90's? I felt so guilty for not doing enough, but I was also getting old and at 65 had already had several surgeries for severe osteoarthritis, melanoma, spinal diseases, bone deformities and PTSD ) Yet she acted as if I were *younger, younger then her so obviously not in as much need or pain as she was. She many times mentioned I had so much free time I could spend more time with her.. We should have traded places! (I was divorcing after 30 years). Many here say it is too much for them, so why are we all continuing the care? Feeling guilty for not driving ourselves into the ground way before our parents? Is it the a generation thing? Do they not see we are tired? Do they see us as forever young? My mom never thanked me and I admit that hurt at times. What is my problem? I loved her.. Do others feel used at times? I feel bad because I feel angry.