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In the past, she did not sleep that well but got up very well. Now, she sleeps well but finds it hard to get up and she's very tired half of the week.


Should I get her to bed about 8 when she’s getting tired and not keep her up? I don’t like to just leave her in bed. She moves with a zimmer and can walk with me if I hold her hands. She goes up on a stairlift, but sometimes in the day she can walk up stairs with me behind her.


So could staying in bed too late be worse for her mobility? Is it okay for one day to just let her stay in bed more? Or would she get too used to it?

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We let mom sleep as late as she wants. Sometimes she gets up at 9 sometimes noon most times somewhere in between. I never schedule anything for her before 12 or 1
Her bedtime is always 8pm. She lays in bed and loves to watch tv until I come in to turn it off at the time she wants 10pm. Most days she takes a long afternoon nap as well. She is 93 and I feel she deserves to be on her own schedule not mine. Hope this helps.
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Reply to arlahouston
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I believe that at the age of 92, we all deserve to sleep as long and as much as we want to, without our loved ones trying to tell us otherwise.
She's 92 for Pete's sake, and I'm sure her body is very tired. Let your mom direct how much or how little she wants to sleep. If she's tired at 6:00 p.m. and wants to go to bed, put her to bed. Or if it's 10:00 p.m. and she's wide awake and doesn't want to go to bed then keep her up.
And perhaps you need to have the caregivers come in after 10:00 a.m. if your mom is still wanting to sleep at 9:00.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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I love that you want the best for her! I have a friend that just turned 98, her mind is so sharp, she goes to bed about 8-9 PM and gets up between 6-10AM. I swear you would think she was 40 if you spoke on the phone. She loves to read, watch and play Jeopardy, still lives Alon, and cooks and cleans. She has help with food shopping and people that check in on her. I wish everyone could be so healthy and lucky 🍀.
I agree with the person who wrote to have her fatigue checked out with her doctor. If everything is ok, then I would suggest a similar bed schedule to my friends. (If possible). From all the Harvard Medical advice on health, the most important things to keep us going and thriving are:

To get enough sleep for our brains
To try and get stretching and exercise each day
Eat as healthy as possible with a variety of fruits, veggies, ect…
Keep our minds learning something new each day
Keep stress down as mush as possible

Even with all of that, unfortunately, things can still go wrong. At some point the body will become diseased, or just shut down. If she still has enjoyment in her life, I feel it is best to do anything you can to keep your loved ones here and thriving, so we can enjoy them too. Many people on this site, can be very negative. Many think you should not waste your life doing anything for someone who has one foot out of the door. I disagree. Just like with plants, they can look almost dead, but with the right amount of care they can come back strong. Obviously, this is not always the case. Best of luck to you both ❤️
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Reply to Tiger8
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Halifax1896 Jun 21, 2025
Excellent reply thank you. So true.
(1)
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I would let her sleep more. And yes, get her to bed at 8 when she's tired.

I'm impressed with her mobility, such as walking up the stairs. During the hours when she is awake, try and encourage more movement, exercise, even passive exercise, (someone moving her limbs for her) to help keep her from losing mobility too quickly.
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Reply to CaringWifeAZ
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MY mother who is also 92years old sleeping all day. it turns out that she was being over medicated. and the effects can last into the next day. Have a pharmacist go over her meds to make sure she is timing them right and also is not duplicating meds she does not need. My mother Made a big change with her meds and has more positive attitude now.
even though i dont have one, a geriatric doctor might be more knowlegible to reccomend changes in meds.
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Reply to cherkar
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Halifax1896 Jun 21, 2025
So true. My 91 year old father was being given way too much blood pressure medication. Once I realized it and contacted all of his doctors and two of them cut meds out completely. All of his dizziness went away, and he was able to walk again much more safely.
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The rule at end of life is "Sleep more, eat less".
Soon enough one passes into an almost fetal "back-to-the-womb" position, knees drawn up, speechless and unable to swallow.
This really, if all medical tests have been tried, is end of life and a time for Hospice.

Forcing activity on dying elders isn't the answer.
Please speak with doctor and rule out further medical intervention, and a move to palliative or end of life care.

My best to you.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Halifax1896 Jun 21, 2025
Sounds like the lady is very active and wants to remain so. I say encourage as much of that as possible. Too many give up on people when they show the slightest signs of deterioration. It doesn’t sound like her caregiver is forcing anything on her. And they definitely should check her meds. My father was terribly overmedicated with his high blood pressure medicine at 91 and was having dizzy spells while walking. Some thought he shouldn’t be walking at all. As soon as I straightened all of this out with his doctors and they took off two of the meds, he was walking fine.
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We all have a limited lifespan on this planet.

My late mother at age 94-95 slept about 20 hours daily until she passed away in 2024.
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Reply to Patathome01
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pgcaregiver Jun 27, 2025
my mother sleeps that much as well. She is 95 yrs old. How long did this go on for your mom?
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A3mops: She needs to see her physician.
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Reply to Llamalover47
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A change in sleep and energy levels should be discussed with her doctor. There are some medical issues that can cause this to happen - and can be treated. If everything checks out medically, she may just be getting slower as her organs are older. So, letting her sleep until she is "done" is probably the right solution for her - and will make her happier with you. Either let her go to bed earlier or let her sleep in later. Sleep studies suggest that everybody does better when they keep to the same bedtimes and waketimes; consistency seems to be the key.
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Reply to Taarna
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