Recently, mom has begun to ask why she can't remember what day it is, what she's had for breakfast and why she loses things. How do I answer her questions, or do I? - AgingCare.com

Recently, mom has begun to ask why she can't remember what day it is, what she's had for breakfast and why she loses things. How do I answer her questions, or do I?

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for breakfast. She does have dementia and it seems to be getting worse since the ALF arrangements. She's also very depressed. How do I answer her questions about why she can't remember, or do I? My Mom is in an ALF.
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I think that she should be evaluated for the depression and some medications can be very helpful with this situation. We hesitate somewhat to give medication however if it would help her I think it is a GREAT idea... take care.
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I also agree with Shelley. Depression by itself can cause forgetfulness and confusion. I work in a locked facility- the residents all have dementia. When a resident first moves in, there is always a period of adjustment and sometimes an acceleration of symptoms. IMO there is not enough screening for depression. How many other residents are there? Could you help your Mom develop a friendship with another resident? I am thinking of two ladies with early onset dementia- they can't remember where their rooms are, but they always sit together at meals, wander the hallways together, and share a sense of humor about their predicament. I think the friendship gives their lives meaning.
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Your Mom is lucky to have you in her life! I took care of my mother-in-law for a long time, she had Alzheimer's. All the above ideas are excellent! Perhaps it's time to talk to the doctor about her depression.
If it's a clinical depression,, there are medications that may help her with that.

As my mother-in-laws Alzheimer's progressed, she went from living on her own, to living with us, retirement facility, to assisted living, to a
locked nursing home wing, to just the regular nursing home. It's hard on you and her, but she may need to move to the next level of care. Keep things as cheerful and light as you can, take care of YOURSELF. Tere are wonderful support groups, reach to one and you'll find people who can help you and whom your own experiences will help. God Bless
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My concern is more about her depression in the assisted living facility. Many people go through a certain amount of depression AND an increase in dementia symptoms when transitioning from their own home into a higher level of care. But still, you may want to talk to her and the staff about how she is coping, whether or not she is participating in activities, has met any new friends and how she might be able to assimilate into her new environment better.
I do agree with everyone else about keeping her memory loss a light-hearted experience.

Best wishes,
Shelley
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My mom is in the beginning stages of demetia and she asks me what day it is. I have a calendar on her refrigerator and I tell her to look at it daily and cross a big X across the date so she knows what day of the month it is. When she says she's losing her mind, I just giggle with her and say "aren't we all". WHich it is true, She is 82 and I'm 53 and I tell her all the time I'll walk into a room and can't rememember what I wanted. She laughs at me and it makes her feel better. Just try to make it silly and she will laugh and not feel like she is losing her mind. Good Luck! I know it's tough but we just speak to them like we do with small children and someday we will look back when they're gone and smile as those moments we were able to help them through just like when we were kids and they helped us. God Bless.
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I took care of my aunt when she had dementia and I would answer her by saying, "because that's what you have me for, so that you don't have to remember everything." I also made a pretty chart where I wrote some info each day that seemed to anchor her---the day of the month, week, and year, the weather outside, where something personal of hers was---she seemed to get some comfort from this. Naturally I changed it each day! Good luck and let me know how it goes:)
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My heart goes out to you - and your mom. I cared for a lady (as respite care) who had advanced Dementia. When she would say "I don't remember that..." and seem worried, I would say "Remembering is over-rated. Sometimes we just don't have room for all that stuff in our head." It works for HER, making a bit of light of the situation. Your mom may be more upset than that, and it may not be appropriate.
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