My mom is in a nursing home and wants to get out. Any advice?

It’s one of the symptoms of her dementia that she doesn’t believe anything is wrong with her. She may need meds to calm her down. Certainly you can remind her that she forgets, but don’t expect her to remember that she forgets or that you told her that she forgets. The prohibition that you’ve heard about reminding her that she forgets was probably meant to save your sanity. Unfortunately, hers is gone. Thus you should explain as little as possible. Cultivate vagueness and a blank look. Or go along with her plans that you can make sure never go anywhere. Sigh a lot, and good luck.

I think she might go on with this for a while, then forget and have another impossible want. The repetition is so hard to deal with, but if you can enter her world with her and just talk to her as if you are right there with her planning, even though nothing will actually happen. My mom would thank me for being the only person who understood during her episodes, such as needing to get outside to meet my dad (who had been dead for 10 years) to save some dogs who were being treated badly. I always wondered why the caregiver couldn't come up with something to calm her instead of trying to make her understand reality. I told her I'd help Dad go get those dogs, not to worry, to go back to sleep.

No she cannot leave. I want to calm her for sure, but the unrelenting pressure on myself makes it difficult for me to stay calm. I have put off seeing her for 2 weeks now and I feel so guilty. I normally see her once or twice a week.

Yes many, in fact she called last week so excited about her Bingo winnings!
Thanks
Julie

Maybe let her plan?? With a Yes Mom, that sounds nice, with other non-committal sounds.

She can't actually leave, right? So is this more to calm her or yourself from her unrelenting pressure?

Are there activities & social groups where she currently lives?