My Mom is doing nothing but screaming constantly!!

Oh PK, I am so sorry for your loss.

May God grant you grieving mercies and strength during this difficult time.

It is a blessing that her suffering is over, she will always be alive in your heart.

Sadly, Mom passed on Thursday evening (Jan 2). I am so sad and emotional as I was very close to her but at the same time I am relieved that her pain and suffering is over and also relieved to go back to my life. It is just so sad that my life will not include living on this earth without her! Thank you everyone for your answers and support!

Pk
so sorry for the difficult journey for your mom and you - be at peace with your decisions and no regrets
as your mom quiets down with the pain meds, you will be able to sit quietly with her, talk to her and hold her hand, pray (if inclined) and play music

MAKE SURE THE ATIVAN IS ON BOARD... !!! IT HELPS THE BRAIN...\\

ATIVAN IS SO IMPORTANT...WITH THE MORPHINE.

Your mom has IV drip... my hospice doesn't believe in IV DRIP, so I was shown by a hospice nurse, the one on the weekends apparently... how to smash morphine pills into a powder and spread it in my mom's cheeks, every hour....She did not even mention ATIVAN. So, mom was suffering a few hours with morphine powder etc. When I got another hospice nurse on phone, he said he would be over ASAP to help me. He got her comfortable, and asked for the ativan which was in the ER packet in refrigerator... so he got her comfortable the rest of the time...

We met with Palliative and Hospice today and all involved agreed that Hospice was the way to go since Mom has stopped eating and drinking and has a very hard time swallowing. I signed the papers today and she is on a continuous morphine drip now until her time comes. Today was a very bad day for her as well she was screaming at the top of her lungs in pain and we just can't figure out where the pain actually is. The Dr has given her all kinds of tests too. It's in God's hands now and even though I am crying, upset and already missing my Mom I know in my heart this is the right thing to do. She has lived a wonderful 89 year life and I know she would want to die with dignity and be comfortable. They say it only takes 3 or 4 days when someone stops drinking so we shall see how long before God takes my Mom but I truly believe and almost everyone at the hospital including my Mom's Dr has assured me I am doing the right thing. Not making it any easier because I love her with all my heart. Thank you all for your input and stories of your experiences they have really helped me!

Thank you all for your input. Because it was a holiday weekend no one from Palliative care is available to meet with us until Monday (12/30). I have told them all NO feeding tube and the Dr. was in the room when my Mom was a bit more lucid and we asked her twice and both times she said NO to the feeding tube as well. The Dr. said that was enough for him. I am her Medical POA and I have been advocating for her through all of this. They told me today that they stopped the meds on the UTI as they feel based on her blood work that the UTI is gone but she still is doing the Mama Mama thing and screams out in pain from time to time but when you ask her specific questions she answers but is still very out of it. Today she took her meds and drank almost a whole Ensure which is probably the best shes' done in the last 10 days. I have no idea what direction we are going in but on Monday when we talk to Palliative care I hope we get some guidance on our next move. Mom's vitals are excellent as well, her blood pressure, heart rate and oxygen rates are all within normal so it looks to me like the dementia from the UTI is just not going away...I am so sad for my Mom but I also know this is not the quality life she would want. I am trying to come to terms with whatever comes next at this point but I still sometimes can't believe that this all started at the end of September when she broke her hip that it has spiraled down to this.

PK, think very seriously about tube feeding. Had my mom tried that at any point, she would have taken it out.

I support your decision of meeting with palliative care 100%!

So I am wondering how you think you CAN help your mother? When you say you feel she would not want a feeding tube, what would SHE say? Do you have an advanced directive for her? If she doesn’t eat, she will starve to death eventually...this has to be worse than a feeding tube. Is this what you want to see? Palliative care is mostly for end of life pain.. so I surmise the Dr. is telling you either a tube or this is the end...that is what “another option” means. Because what is your plan if no tube?
I don’t mean to sound harsh, but I”ve been thru the wringer with both parents in the last 2 years, and I’ve has to become hardened to having to make difficult decisions, but in the best interest of my parents. These have been the most difficult 2 years of my life, and I am sorry for you... best wishes..

I forgot to ask you if your mom is urinary and bowel incontinent. Also, how is her mobility ? That will tell you
if she is at the end of late stage dementia.

Sometimes, sadly, screaming could mean death is near.

My mother passed away about 15 days ago. She has struggled with LBD for about 8 years and my sister and I cared for her till the end. She had reached what seemed to be a plateau in the progression of her illness but then all of a sudden her agitation, incontinence, aggression, paranoia all became amplified. She ended up in the hospital with a UTI like your mom and like her she spent her 15 days there screaming her head off extremely agitated and upset. I caught that she was not even recognizing my sister or me. I know first hand the stress you are going through..... in the midst of our confusion and stress while she was at the hospital we requested a Hospice assessment and that was the best thing we did. It turns out that she met criteria and we took her home under their care ( in home hospice). It could be that your mom’s condition may have progressed to the point of qualifying for Hospice. Hospice has many alternatives to ease her anxiety while her body starts shutting down. The fact that she is calling her mama if her mom has passed away is very telling. My mom spoke to all her dead relatives during the time she was approaching her death. Looking back ... she was ready to go. She passed away painlessly and peacefully at home. My heart goes out to you and I will keep you in my prayers.

https://www.alzheimers.net/2014-04-03/connection-between-utis-and-dementia/

What I would do  is immediately (a)  ask to meet with the attending, or a urologist or other specialist treating her, or (b) the charge nurse if neither doctor is available, and (c) ask either or all of them for more detail, a plan of care, what lab results are showing, if there's another appropriate med, and what other treatment can be considered.