She refused to let doctors amputate her legs, (no blood seculation) she keeps trying to get up, but her legs don't work.

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How old is Mom?

If her legs needed amputation, then I will assume that she is a diabetic. Maybe the Dementia like symptoms are being caused by her diabetes or the situation she is in. Does she have heart problems. I guess when she refused amputation that she was told what would happen. I guess just answer her questions without going into a lot of detail.
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Reply to JoAnn29

All questions should be answered honestly and as completely with as much easy to understand information as your LO can actually absorb. Your Hospice folks are familiar with all of this, and they will be your excellent guides. I am wishing you good luck moving forward, and rest and peace for the one you love.
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Reply to AlvaDeer

When she made the decision to avoid amputation, did she realize she was choosing death?

Does she no longer remember that choice?

I assume that the prognosis is that her legs will become gangrenous. Do YOU understand what the "end game" is here? This is a truly awful way to die. Watched my grandmother die of a gangrenous leg 45 years ago.
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn

I am also wondering what you mean by "beginnings of dementia"? Is her short-term memory faultering? Repeating the same questions? Or some other behavior?
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Reply to Geaton777

We’re ALL dying, from the very second we’re born.

Having gotten that out of the way, is there some good reason to tell her she’s dying?

If she has refused amputation, is she still considered able cognitively to be responsible for herself and her own decision making???

How was it determined that she’s at “the beginnings of dementia”? Who determined that?

The safest course with questions is to stay as specific as possible to the question being asked. If you are caring for her, you can also contact hospice for information about how to best respond to her concerns.
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Reply to AnnReid

What kind of questions is she asking?

Do you think that she would like to speak with her social worker from hospice? I would start there or with clergy if she is religious.
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Reply to NeedHelpWithMom

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