My mom tells me that she recently talked with Julie...or will ask me how Julie likes her new place, etc etc. But I am Julie. And I am the only one who sees her. Other family members call sometimes but its me only. I went over there Saturday to "fix" her computer, and when I talked to her today I asked how her computer was working and she angrily told me that "Julie was over her and clicked and clicked and clicked and broke it". I wasn't quite sure what to say! What is that about?? Anyone else have this? I kinda wonder who she thinks I am! LOL
Surely you can see that this is unsustainable, and that you can't provide the level of care she now needs?
It's really tough when you are the only person in their world. I think the isolation contributes to the confusion about people, place & time. My mom mostly stays in her apartment at her ALF and refuses to participate in activities, dine with others, or make friends.
And sadly it's very common for someone with dementia to not know who a family member is anymore. Your mom probably just thinks that you are a person who comes and checks on her to make sure she's ok.
I see in your profile that your mom is still living by herself. That is so very dangerous, and while you say that she doesn't want to move to a facility or have in home help, you now have to do what is best for her as she can no longer make those important decisions herself. Her safety needs to now be your top priority.
Education is key when dealing with anyone with dementia, so make sure you're reading all you can about this horrific disease, so you're better prepared for what is yet to come.
Whatever flits thru your Moms mind is her reality. She can no longer distinguish between the real world, TV and dreams. They all blend into one reality.
Often family is introduced to caregivers as "This nice person comes to visit me".
You are now in the end stages of dementia. I'm so sorry. The internet is your friend and if you go online and research you will find this is exceptionally common.