My mom has become blind in the last 8 years and needs help but is very abusive. Any suggestions?
My mom is 74 and I am 34. She has become almost completely blind in the last 8 years so I have to travel to her apartment via a 45 min. bus ride about 3x per week to take her shopping, clean her house and she also calls me over to reset anything with buttons where she may have touched the wrong button and messed up her TV, clock radio, oven, etc. I wouldn't have a problem making the long trip to come over and help her, but she is VERY verbally/emotionally abusive and emotionally manipulative. She was always abusive like this, my whole life, and even though I resent her for abusing me as a child, I still help her because she has no one. Through her abusiveness, she has chased everyone off including my dad (who is dead now). so she doesn't even have friends or extended family to help her. Every time I come to help her, I take an emotional beating. And you might say, "Well, you are 44 now so just ignore it," but she is my mother and knows how to press my buttons and rip the scars off of old wounds. I feel beat up after every visit. And a lot of times, if we have plans to go shopping together, if I say the wrong thing on the phone before a visit, she will freak out and cancel the whole thing, only to call me back the next week to schedule the task again. I really want to disown her but I feel bad because then she would have no help. I live in Toronto, Canada. does anyone know of a government service that could take over the things that I currently do? Or, also, does anyone have a similar experience that they would be willing to share with me so that I don't feel so alone in this?