She has multiple physical ailments and is home bound with hospice care and family care to keep her at home. She becomes convinced she’s been away in a rental house in NH... but also has intermittent clarity that this is not true!! She says it’s not like a dream, but feels utterly real. This started a number of weeks ago, but has now become a daily occurrence and is causing her a lot of distress. Anyone have similar issues??

P.S. She’s had many mini strokes and has not been diagnosed with AH or dementia... it’s just kind of assumed. She’s 90.)

My grandma went from fine to full blow dementia over a 3 day period from a series of small strokes.

Don't correct her and don't bring it up, just acknowledge it when she talks about it.

I am sorry that you are dealing with these behaviors at this point of her journey, it is confusing. Just do your best to make her happy in the moment and make her feel loved it truly is the best way right now.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to Isthisrealyreal

Keeping her comfortable and content and peaceful is the goal.

Go with the flow. If she’s upset that she was “away” tell her how glad you are that she’s right there with you.

If she is happy she was there tell her how beautiful the Spring will be, and leave the statement open ended.

Follow her cue, not too much detail, “Your safe right here and we love you”.
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Reply to AnnReid

Would it help if you went along and agreed with her? You could say that you took her to NH for a short vacation, a change of scenery. Tell her you would bring her back in a few weeks. Would that calm her down?
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to polarbear
freqflyer Mar 25, 2020
I agree with polarbear, just go along with your Mom's story. Pretend it happened.

My Mom thought her long-term-care facility was a hotel in the area where her parents lived. It wasn't. I just agreed with her. It made life for both of us a bit easier.
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Well, I would speak to her doctor about it. Something is going on.

Best wishes to you and your mom. Keep us posted.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to NeedHelpWithMom

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