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As I’ve posted before – there is no specific test for Dementia that tackles more than the memory problems. There is perhaps a cognitive test – but nothing more. Doctors don’t have an emotional, self-control exam for patients. What I’d like to confirm is that must we carers then look out for behavioural proof of the deterioration of the patient?


I woke up about 4 am in the morning with the sound of the shower running. I thought it was my mam having a shower. Then as time passed – the shower flow was constant – not what you’d expect when someone is under it. So I got up and looked into the toilet. The door was open and inside – she was there staring into the shower cubicle – lowering and increasing the flow. She was not having a shower. When she realized I was watching – she quickly turned the shower off.


A friend of mine experienced something similar; his dad use to insist on turning all the water taps on in the house. My friend would turn them off – only to find they were on again later. It’s quite funny in a way, but has anyone experienced something similar? I think they are after the white-noise in the water flow. They might be hearing something in the random cascade of droplets.


Regards to all.

VAuser1, the love was always there. The patience was learned through better understanding of the disease, help and support from here. I wish you the best of luck.
Luz did a lot of things that I did not like but I learned to accept that it was not her doing these things but the disease doing it. Yes I would get angry at things she did but I kept telling myself that it was the disease, over and over. Then I would give her a hug and we both felt better.
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VAuser1 Jun 18, 2019
That's a classy method - and I think it's the only one that will work. However, in order to protect my peace - I have to distance my self emotionally. I have to treat mam as a nurse or a doctor would; I have to have barriers up. As far as I'm concerned - mam is gone and the disease is here to stay. I have to treat her like a child almost.
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VAuser1, Luz had FTD type of dementia. She wanted to do things to help out anyone or anything. Along with the shower and tub cleaning she would stop me in stores to straighten shelves. She once pushed another patient in rehab around the facility (under the hands on supervision of the RN) to help calm the patient, and assisted another patient in the dining room get her wheel chair lined up correctly to leave the room.
Everything that she tried to do but would fail at I tried to praise her efforts and then I would fix it. I would get upset on occasion but I tried to keep it low level and give her a hug for her efforts.
This went on for over two years and I loved her every minute of it. Even when she would turn on a faucet for whatever reason and fail to turn it off.
Those are some of the memories that blur my vision these days.
I kept telling myself that it wasn't her but the disease causing this.
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VAuser1 Jun 17, 2019
I know that's the right attitude to adapt. But I just find insanity repulsive and an acts that's just "crazy" causes anger to flare up in me. I'm not cut out to be a carer really. So I will be saying goodbye - very soon.

I must say I admire the patience and love you've described. It's the Christian persona being demonstrated. I'm not that good at it - I must admit. But I will bear in mind - your example.
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One of my mother’s neighbors does that frequently and of course it’s at the oddest hours. No dementia there at all.

She says it calms her and reminds her of being immersed in nature. 🤷🏼‍♀️
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VAuser1 Jun 16, 2019
Hmm...interesting. Water therapy in the oddest time of the day. Saves going out for a walk next to a stream?
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I have said more than a few times here - that I notice a lot of similarities between dementia and autism.

My son has severe autism. I’ve always called Rainman my water baby as he was fixated with water even as a very young toddler.

Rainman is now 26 and through years of redirecting and social behavior cueing his water fixation isn’t as intense. Still - there are many mornings when I’m showering him that he goes there - into his water zone. He holds his arm and hand in a certain way and becomes transfixed with watching the water run off his fingers. I think it’s something with the light - how it shimmers off the water droplets.

The orignal post and OldSailors post both could be describing autism very easily.

To be clear - I’m not suggesting that the individuals they are referring to were/are autistic. But I definitely think their water fixation as a result of dementia MUST share a brain change in wiring - for lack of a scientific term - with how a brain with autism works.

I wish scientists and the medical community would explore any possible connection. I do believe strongly that techniques could be developed- based on strategies for dealing with autism- that better help caregivers deal with the behaviors of their loved ones suffering with dementia.
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VAuser1 Jun 15, 2019
She's not done this noticeably since last this time last year. Mam is University Cum Laude; very good with figures and grammar. But fixation with water - has to be dementia - surely.
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Oh Yes, DW, Luz, would run the water heater out of hot water while in the shower. Most of the time was sent cleaning it. Especially washing the glass. Usually this would last for about an hour.
Later when she quit using the shower she would do the same thing in the step-in tub. Washing the fixtures and the walls. I had to watch her here or she would try to open the door with it still full of water.
Gosh I miss those days.
Thanks for bringing those memories back.
I hope this only posts once.
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VAuser1 Jun 15, 2019
LOL.

Was that Dementia then - on poor DW, Luz?
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Oh Yes, DW, Luz, would run the water heater out of hot water while in the shower. Most of the time was sent cleaning it. Especially washing the glass. Usually this would last for about an hour.
Later when she quit using the shower she would do the same thing in the step-in tub. Washing the fixtures and the walls. I had to watch her here or she would try to open the door with it still full of water.
Gosh I miss those days.
Thanks for bringing those memories back.
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