He had declined rapidly and had been in a facility for over a year. This Friday is his birthday--he would have been 74.
He and I moved from WI to TX to be near family because I could not do it alone anymore. I moved in with my daughter and SIL and DH moved to a NH. Now that he is gone I still live with my daughter and her hubs. That is working out okay. Not great, but certainly doable.
MY daughter and her father were very close. Now that his birthday is near--we are all going out to dinner at a FANCY restaurant to celebrate--she is experiencing serious depression. She has a good job and works from home, but it is somewhat seasonal and now is the 'down' time, so it does not take up much of her time. Her husband is retired and stays home most of the time. In addition, his (unmarried) daughter X lives with us also, and her 5 month old baby boy. SIL is enraptured with the new baby. Understandable. But the daughter is a total slob. Everyone but her recognizes this and agrees that she is a pig, but the only ones who care are me and my daughter. SIL just shrugs and says So What? But picking up after her--she leaves crap around everywhere, both hers and the baby's--places a bigger burden on the rest of us. They are looking to move about 200 miles away so are searching that area for a new home, and go most weekends to scout the area. X is enrolled in nursing school and takes classes online. She actively resists having anyone care for the baby but her dad. She tolerates my daughter holding him, but I am not even allowed to talk to the baby. I know this is her and not me, so I am okay with that. But son in law sees my daughter's not being involved with the baby as a failure on my daughter's part--he does not sees that X excludes others from taking over baby's care. So he makes negative remarks to my daughter re: her un-involvement with the baby. So my daughter--who is a very strong woman, is experiencing depression and has used up her allotment for mental health therapy from her insurance. --3 sessions, which was not enuff anyway. She is sad and miserable. What can I do to help? I hate seeing her like this. I understand the situation, but I try to remain positive and upbeat, although I am still dealing with the loss of my DH myself.