My husband is POA for my mother-in-law for both medical and financial.

Jules
Your BIO says that your MIL is 65 and has Alzheimer’s. Has she not be diagnosed for Alzheimer’s? Is this her age or yours?

If she has not been diagnosed, that’s your next step. Ask the doctor to give her a referral to a neurologist. If it’s DH who is 65 and she is more like 85, that would be helpful to know.

If she is 65, has been diagnosed with Alz, perhaps she is in an early stage? Could you clarify this?

Exactly right. When she can no longer make her own decisions.

Your MIL gave the POA so that her POA will do exactly as she wishes for her so long as she is LEGALLY competent to make her own decisions. When two doctors agree that she is NOT competent to make her own decisions to the extent that she represents a danger to herself or/and others then the POA will go into effect and the POA makes decisions FOR HER that he/she feels is in her best interests for her own safety.

Read the document.
Go on line and read about being POA.
It is crucial to understand your own rights and duties and HER rights, because this is a legal fiduciary duty that has rules and legal regulations.

My DH was PoA for his mother and he didn't do one single thing with it.

His OB was the driving force to get her moved to ALF. His OB wrote the checks to the ALF and for some things she needed for furnishing said ALF. SIL wrote the checks for the funeral, et al, and DH never signed anything.

Since everyone was in agreement over all this--it wasn't an issue, but wow, it sure could have become one!

DH is now the executor and isn't enjoying it one bit.

The ALF never asked for proof of PoA. Maybe because the kids were all in the same frame of mind about what was going on.

Legally? I'm sure they were not following protocol.

Read the POA carefully. My Moms was immediate meaning it was in effect as soon as she signed it. But that word immediate was in one of the paragraphs. If immediate you can have Mom placed. The Medical may need a doctor to make it effective but u don't needvthe medical to place her just the financial.

There are many types of PoAs and some of them may be operated differently in different states. Most people have a Durable PoA which is activated when due to advanced age or an illness, it is determined (by a physician) that they are no longer competent to make sound decisions (it can sometimes be difficult to get a doctor to sign of on this). Basically unless she is deemed incompetent by a physician the power of attorney is not active. If you and the doctors have discussed short term rehab and care with her and she doesn't want to go, you can't force her.

On more thought. If she does decide to go to short term, she may tell your hubby to sign all the admission papers for us as she will be pretty tired with the relocation. If you opt to do this, make sure you sign with the letters "PoA" after your name to prevent you from being liable for any charges.

Good luck on this part of your journey

Your husband must read the PoA document to see what activates his authority. Most often it is at least 1 medical diagnosis of cognitive impairment.

If she's not impaired, she still gets to make her own decisions, which you and hubs are not obligated to participate in.

Did MIL go into the ER for a medical problem? If so, they don't deal with dementia in that type of scenario. Your husband needs to submit the PoA paperwork to all her different *regular* doctors in advance so they have it on file.

At the hospital, did your husband take the PoA docs with him? Or did he only tell them verbally he is the PoA? They don't like to be surprised by this type of info...

A lot of people who agree to become POA mistakenly believe that that means they must do everything the elder wants. Your husband does not need to move heaven and earth to enable his mother to live wherever she wants. Your husband needs to make it clear to the doctors and case manager that you will not be propping her up at home; you will not become her hands-on caregivers. They will then discuss with her what services she needs and, if she says "Oh my son and his wife will help me" you will already have notified the hospital that that is incorrect.

So many people on this forum and myself included enabled what many of us refer to as a "charade of independence". It will suck the life right out of even the most patient and kind individual because older people's needs only increase. Dementia does not get better.

Jules, it depends on what kind of POA you have. Durable, springing? Requires a doctor to sign off that she isn't competent to make safe decisions?

Also, being POA DOESN'T mean you must care for her. If she is competent to go home alone, she's competent enough to arrange for her care, right?

If she's not, push back on discharge. Make it clear that you folks will not be providing care. That might change what the doctors say.

Once it is determined that she has dementia the POA can take over. Some doctors just refuse to make that determination. You may need to take her to a neurologist for a complete workup, including a brain scan.

Until this determined you cannot do anything.