Follow
Share

His blood pressure drops often and he falls easy. He gets angry, very angry and told me no one in the world could stop him to leave. Legally, what can I do to stop him?

If he’s considered mentally sound I’m not sure you can stop him from leaving assisted living. If he comes home you’ll have to decide how to respond to that. Do you have a friend or family member you can go stay with? You shouldn’t subject yourself to the anger, at all. With your own situation you aren’t able to help or even obligated to provide physical care, trying to pick him up from falls will be too much. Since he’s not willing to listen perhaps some time alone at home will prove to him that it isn’t doable for him to pull off this plan. I hope you’ll take care of and protect yourself
Helpful Answer (11)
Reply to Daughterof1930
Report

Is your husband physically and mentally capable of leaving the facility? He says no one can stop him, but could he pull off this move without assistance? Call movers, close out his AL account, arrange transport for himself, and move back home unassisted? If not, you probably don’t have too much to worry about in the very short term. But I would suggest consulting a lawyer to see what your obligations are if indeed he’s able to pull this off, and you cannot handle him at home. I concur with the suggestions that you seriously consider the possibility of you yourself moving to the assisted living facility. Would he stay if you were with him? Do you want to be with him??
Helpful Answer (9)
Reply to rocketjcat
Report

Make it clear to the facility that you have NO capacity to care for him and will call 911 if he falls or needs assistance.

Ask them if they are saying this is a "safe discharge".
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to BarbBrooklyn
Report

This is an Assisted Living. Not sure if they would fall under the "safe discharge" thing. Their residents can come and go. If Dementia, they are usually in a lock down. Your a resident.

Maybe you should go into the AL and let him stay in the home.
Helpful Answer (7)
Reply to JoAnn29
Report

Trade places?
Downsize and go to ALF together?

Is he worried about the finances, or you alone at home?
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to Sendhelp
Report

Call Adult Protective Services to Have them Intervene. You need to Tell them you are Very Ill and your Husband as well, Is in No Shape But instead is Putting you BOTH in Harm's Way, In Caring for you and Himself.
Get them up There and File a Report. You can Go from There, They Care...
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to Parise
Report

Are you able to get a consult with an attorney? I'd find out my legal rights and how to stay safe. If he's a danger to himself or others, there should be legal options.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to Sunnygirl1
Report

It sounds to me like he already came home. I agree with others who say you should move to Independent or Assisted living depending on your current needs. With you gone, he may follow
But please do all you can to stay safe.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to Judysai422
Report

Lock the door & change the lock first - talk to a lawyer about this second - talk to your dr. about how this would endanger your health

Is he capable in moving back on his own? - does he have the money to pay someone? - does he have a suitcase to put his things in? - call the taxi companies to say he has no money to pay for the ride so they don't pick him up - tell family members not to help him
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to moecam
Report

Let him come home and get a home aide. He wants to be home.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to ShenaD
Report

See All Answers

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter