My FIL is flying in for a week long visit. He has COPD and had a heart attack Nov. 2017 (has a stent). This is WAY out of my league - HELP!

Blimey. Best of luck, Castlecathy, keep in touch and let us know how you're getting on.

I have to say, I don't think much to your husband's being all gung-ho about the old man's birthday but not enough to take a day or two off work. Are you going to have *anybody* on hand to help you?

CastleKathy, Please come back and let us know what happens/ed! This is a great place to vent too! Hugs!

A red flag for me was that FIL "demanded" to come for his 93rd birthday.

I am curious -- are there any other children? Does he live near one who has to do all the day-to-day supervision and keep a handle on the 24/7 hired caregiver? I keep thinking of how glad we will all be if Dorker's MIL gets on that flight to her daughter's in IL!

So FIL is flying in today. You will have him all day tomorrow until your H has the weekend off? Is there a party planned for the birthday? And then you will have next week to again do the daytime care for FIL.

He chokes when he eats, has to be reminded to keep his teeth in, and then all the trouble walking? He can't hear? Your house has multiple levels?

Oboy...is this going to mean close supervision of every bite he takes? Supporting him as he walks? Picking him up if he falls? Helping him with toileting (yuck)?

And this absolutely might be looked on as a trial living arrangement on his part. Maybe his money is running out for the 24/7 caregiver? I certainly hope NOT!

So....how’s it going? I hope you’re all having a nice time and you’re enjoying the time you have with him.

I am not sure a 93 year old that chokes on is food, needs oxygen, and is unsteady on his feet, should be flying on a commercial airline.

The tightness of the seats could cause a post flight blood clot, and who will help him if he chokes on his food or falls down.

Guess she is busy with him. He was suppose to be there by now.

CastleKathy, please come back and tell us if FIL made it. Did he stay just the week, or has it become longer?

Hope we hear how castlekathy fares on this situation :)

I messaged her. Hope she answers!

castlekathy: Dear Lord, I'm asking you in your Holy Name that we could receive word from this lady. AMEN

Thank you all for your encouragement and advice. The week long visit was just that. My FIL is in MUCH better shape than we were led to believe by his 24/7 live in caregiver (figures!). My husband was able to take him with him everyday when he went to work (small business owner) so they could enjoy each others company and give me a break. My husband was forced to acknowledge his father's limitations and respond accordingly - it was a much needed eyeopening experience for him caring for his father 24/7 (including oxygen, meds, 'britches/briefs duty', showering, and the multitude of things required). The end of the visit ended on an upbeat note - FIL said he couldn't believe the week was over and 'wished he could stay longer' (uh, no...). I think he also knows this was probably the last time he would be able to make this trip as his parting words to me were 'See you when I see you!'. Again, THANK YOU, ALL that responded to my HELP post - this truly is a caring, helpful community of folks!!