My father passed away, tomorrow will be a week. I’m feeling empty and I have no motivation. My mother is coping different than I am and I’m getting angry with her. How soon should I seeks help to get over my fathers death?
Everyone grieves differently. Your mom has lived with his alcoholism for many years and I am sure the doctors for many years have told both your mom and dad that his drinking is killing him. She may have been grieving for 10, or more years. (At this point it might almost be a relief for her that he is no longer in pain, no longer has to deal with the alcoholism.) You are angry with her that maybe she is "moving on"? But are you angry with your dad that he was an alcoholic? Maybe this is all coming out wrong and I hope you understand my meaning. I think an Al-Anon group might help. Google groups in your area.
And.. A week is not nearly long enough to "get over" a death. 6 years have passed since my Husband died and 99.99% of the time I am just fine, once in a while I get in a funk. (he had Alzheimer's and Vascular dementias.) Keep busy. Talk about your dad, that keeps him close. If you are angry with him, tell him. Talk to him, write him a letter just get it out of you. Do something that keeps you busy, focused. Do things that will honor him. Your dad was very young, I am sorry for your loss.
1 week is way too soon to "get over" your fathers death regardless of the circumstances behind it. Give yourself as much time as you need to mourn his loss, and eventually you will probably want to seek some therapy/counseling for yourself, as you will more than likely need help to process all the dysfunction that comes with dealing with an alcoholic parent. I can only guess that your mother is feeling some type of relief after his death as I'm sure she dealt with a lot prior to it, so be kind to her and respect her feelings. You are both entitled to your own feelings, different as they may be. I'm sorry that you had to deal with an alcoholic father. I know it was hard. My first husband is a recovering alcoholic, as is my son, so I know all too well the devastation alcoholism can cause in a family. Please take good care of yourself and don't rush the grieving process. God bless you.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’ve lost my dad and know how painful that can feel. Please know that everyone has a different way to cope with loss and grief, and no one way is right or wrong. It’s never too soon to reach out for help with grief. Many have been helped by the groups of GriefShare, you can look up where they may meet in your area. Also, look into local and/or online grief counselors. I wish you much healing and peace
Your mom has lived with his alcoholism for many years and I am sure the doctors for many years have told both your mom and dad that his drinking is killing him.
She may have been grieving for 10, or more years.
(At this point it might almost be a relief for her that he is no longer in pain, no longer has to deal with the alcoholism.)
You are angry with her that maybe she is "moving on"? But are you angry with your dad that he was an alcoholic?
Maybe this is all coming out wrong and I hope you understand my meaning.
I think an Al-Anon group might help. Google groups in your area.
And..
A week is not nearly long enough to "get over" a death.
6 years have passed since my Husband died and 99.99% of the time I am just fine, once in a while I get in a funk. (he had Alzheimer's and Vascular dementias.)
Keep busy.
Talk about your dad, that keeps him close.
If you are angry with him, tell him. Talk to him, write him a letter just get it out of you.
Do something that keeps you busy, focused. Do things that will honor him.
Your dad was very young, I am sorry for your loss.
I can only guess that your mother is feeling some type of relief after his death as I'm sure she dealt with a lot prior to it, so be kind to her and respect her feelings. You are both entitled to your own feelings, different as they may be.
I'm sorry that you had to deal with an alcoholic father. I know it was hard. My first husband is a recovering alcoholic, as is my son, so I know all too well the devastation alcoholism can cause in a family.
Please take good care of yourself and don't rush the grieving process.
God bless you.