Mary, you say that you “cry and get hysterical at least 3x a day”. That’s probably a good reason for you not to have POA, which requires level-headed financial dealings. Your take on things is that your family members are “extremely emotionally abusive to me”. Perhaps they are, but perhaps you need help to get on an even keel yourself.
Is there somewhere or someone you can talk to about your own feelings? Sharing your problems might help you find things easier to cope with. And of course if you really are a victim of extreme abuse, it should point you towards the help you need to cope with that as well.
Mary, clearly you are suffering from abuse. You are grown now, and must find a way to remove yourself from it. If you don't feel strong enough to do that, then reach out to a good psychologist who will help you move on a new path leaving old habitual ways of acting and reacting behind you. This will be hard work, make no mistake, because as awful as habitual abuse is, it represents the NORM for some people, and new ways, new roads, new paths are extremely scary. Pat yourself on the back when you decide to address this for yourself. Only you can do it. And you will be so proud of yourself, able to move on giving your love to those who appreciate it.
I sure wish you the best. NO ONE but you can do this. Our sympathy is all but worthless, as you will know, having received, I would imagine, sympathy in the past. It's very briefly comforting, but in the long run it is hard work that wins the day in life.
I read ur previous question. Is Mom 49 or you? Why is your Dad not her POA? If Mom is competent she should assign her husband at least. Why is everyone so adamant it should not be you. Looks like everyone but you has their heads in the sand. Mom is not excepting she is terminal. Her oncologist needs to sit down and tell her what is going on. Cancer does metastasize. Could start in the liver and then spread throughout the body. Maybe the oncologist told Mom that there was nothing more that can be done and she wouldn't except it. Doctors do not recommended Hospice unless they feel nothing more can be done.
Seems that ur family is not interested in what u think or say. Mom wants to deal with her cancer her way. She has the final decision whether Hospice is brought in or not. You need to honor her wishes. Time to just be there for her and allow her to spend her final days the way she wants.
So so sorry for you! All I can say is step back and let them do it. However if mom calls for you - come - not for her but for you. I can tell from your statement that you love her so. Know that cancer is the worst, please don't let it tear your family apart. Love your family, love yourself, love your mom. Hugs to you!
Is there somewhere or someone you can talk to about your own feelings? Sharing your problems might help you find things easier to cope with. And of course if you really are a victim of extreme abuse, it should point you towards the help you need to cope with that as well.
My father and sister (and mother sometimes) are extremely emotionally abusive to me. I cry and get hysterical at least 3x a day.
No one will listen to me, I am thinking of walking away.
I sure wish you the best. NO ONE but you can do this. Our sympathy is all but worthless, as you will know, having received, I would imagine, sympathy in the past. It's very briefly comforting, but in the long run it is hard work that wins the day in life.
Seems that ur family is not interested in what u think or say. Mom wants to deal with her cancer her way. She has the final decision whether Hospice is brought in or not. You need to honor her wishes. Time to just be there for her and allow her to spend her final days the way she wants.
And that she, your dad and sister don't want you to have POA.
So, they've tied your hands. Let them rely on your sister.
You can visit. You just can't help them if they don't want it.
Can you tell us a bit more?