Follow
Share

My dad is a retired teacher and not a veteran. He was diagnosed with end-stage CHF in January 2018. He's still walks slowly with a walker and goes to eat in his dining room in a wheelchair. He requires 24-hour seven-days-a-week care because of his diagnosis and multiple falls. I have had multiple social worker visits and it is not an option for him to be alone. He has already paid for 6 months of In-Home Care using half of his and mom's savings, coordinated by a senior care company. He insists on living at home. My brother and I both have full-time jobs and are very busy. I care for my dad once a week and buy groceries another day out of the week plus take my dad to doctor's appointments. My brother comes on Saturdays. We have been caring for him for seven years and both parents before mom died 3 years ago.


I talked my dad into trying assisted living but he behaved so badly that in one month he was back at home. Moving in with him is not an option after reading this forum for several years, plus I tried living with him on my days off already. I have had health problems and I missed out on a job promotion because I was busy with my dad the night before an interview. That is when I hired the caregiving company.


My brother and I are discussing private care at $15/hr right now which could keep him in his house for about eight more months, but it will bring in a lot of stress that we don't need any more of. Even with the Senior Care Company sometimes the caregivers don't show up or they are hours late. But luckily I don't have to deal with it now.


It is dad's idea to sell his house, have the buyer charge him rent to stay there, and use the money from the sale of the house to pay for his care. that would give him two years of living at home. I know it is his property and he owns it outright, but is this a good idea?


I know people's responses are going to be to talk to a Elder lawyer. But I want to know what everyone thinks. Thank you.

Find Care & Housing
janellkling, regarding selling the house and your Dad renting back.... many an investor would love the idea of having a "tenant" already in the house. Dad would be taking a chance as to what would be the rent..... Dad may think $900 is good enough when the rental market would get $2k per month.

As Molly had mentioned, talk with an "Elder Law Attorney". I would also recommend talk with a Certified Public Accountant, as there may or may not be IRS Capital Gain Taxes with the sale of Dad's house. I don't know if the Capital Gain deduction is still in affect, with all the recent changes to income taxes, it's best to speak with someone in the know.

In my area, experienced caregivers are $30/hour, more on weekends, so the cost was over $20k per month [3 shifts each day]. The caregivers were from a caregiving agency which was licensed, bonded, insured, and had workman's comp for its employees.

Then Dad decided the house and yard were just too much for him to maintain, so he sold the house, put the money into the stock market and money market, and moved to Independent Living where he had a very nice sunny 2-bedroom apartment. He was able to budget to bring along his favorite day time caregiver [1 shift], and it still cost half as much as living at home, and he felt like he had more freedom. My Dad would always listen when $$$ was involved :)

Do any of the grocery stores in your area use on-line shopping? I've been using that for many years and its been a Godsend for me. Buying my parent's their groceries, then turning around and going back to the store for my own groceries was wearing me out. I would order both my groceries, then my parent's groceries on-line separately, and the next day go curb side to pick the groceries up... no going into the store.
Helpful Answer (5)
Reply to freqflyer
Report

This is the same situation my mom is in. This past August my son bought her house, she uses the money for her 24/7 care, and pays him rent. He paid fair market value, and a rental agreement between them was signed so that everything will pass with Medicaid when we apply.
In our case a reverse mortgage didn’t make sense because the amount that they would’ve loaned her didn’t justify that process.

The elder care attorney we were working with said it was a solid idea.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to mollymoose
Report

Why not a reversed mortgage. Its based on the equity in the house. Your Dad can draw on the equity to pay for his care. At time of death, the mortgage co. will recoupe the money. There is more involved but this gives u the idea. One problem may if you need Medicaid at some point. Not sure how they look at RMs.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to JoAnn29
Report

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter