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I believe she has dementia and it’s been a rough road. I haven’t even been able to grieve my Dad I’m so frustrated and any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.

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Glad you have an appointment with neurology. Is the plan that she get her cognition/thinking issues diagnosed?

Make sure that you get an evaluation that goes beyond "who is the president, what year is it, where are you?".

You are looking for a neurocognitive workup to assess her ability to function and live alone. "What level of support does she need? She is currently staying with me, but I cannot house her indefinitely. We need a plan for her to return to her home or to be placed in an appropriate facility". That's a suggestion of what to say when the doc asks why you've brought her in.
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NurseVicki Oct 25, 2018
Thank you so much for your help. She definitely needs a more thorough work up besides who’s the president etc. that’s all they do in the hospital and I explained to them that she had memory loss etc but they did nothing about it Thank you again any help is much appreciated
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So, are you looking to get her placed, or are you thinking about how to approach your ned to grieve? Or both?
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NurseVicki Oct 24, 2018
Both
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Have you talked to the geriatric psychiatrists at Stony Brook? It seems pretty clear from your post that your mom needs ongoing treatment/care.
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NurseVicki Oct 24, 2018
She is on meds and seeing a psychiatrist and therapist and she has a neurologist appointment for Monday
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I'd find her a geriatric psychiatrist and a therapist and make her appts with both. It's essential that she take care of her mental health so as to try and avoid another episode. The geri psych might want to refer her to a neurologist as well for a neuro cognitive evaluation.

If her living with you gets to be too much, you can also ask her doctor or therapist for recommendations as to living arrangements. For example, with my mom, who suffers from dementia and mental illness, I found out recently from her therapist that there is a nursing home facility close to us that specializes in patients with mental illness, and my mom will likely end up needing to move there at some point if she fails to improve where she is.
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NurseVicki Oct 24, 2018
Thank you I actually just made an appointment with a neurologist for Monday. She has a referral from her psychiatrist.
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Nurse Vicki; Where is your closest University Hospital with a psychiatric ER?
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NurseVicki Oct 24, 2018
Stonybrook
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Was she discharged just to attend the funeral? Have you called the facility to ask for her to be readmitted?
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NurseVicki Oct 24, 2018
Hi they told me if I have a problem I have to go to the ER she can’t be readmitted. I had to find her a psychiatrist and therapist. She lives in NJ 3 1/2 hours away and I live on Long Island. She came to live with me and they said they couldn’t set up discharge plans in NY.
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Hi they discharged her with no discharge plan because they felt it was important for her to attend the funeral
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Could you explain why your mother was discharged? It sounds like a particularly unsettling time to pick. And incredibly difficult for you!
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