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The VA doesn’t directly pay for a veteran’s spouses nursing home care unless:
She qualifies on her own as a surviving spouse of a deceased veteran or she is admitted to a State Veteran’s Home that allows spouses (rare and varies by state).

If the veteran qualifies for a VA pension, he may get extra monthly income through Aid and Attendance because his wife needs care. That money is meant to pay for care, even for a spouse. He must:
Have served during a wartime period (not necessarily in combat), meet income and asset limits, need help with activities of daily living (or his wife does, if applying as a couple).

Long term care is usually paid for by Medicaid, not the VA. Most states have programs for long term care Medicaid. Applications are through the Department of Human/Social Services.

Wishing you the best as you move forward.
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I highly recommend contacting your county office for Veterans. There are people who charge to help with this and there are others who get grants that pay for their services. There is a lot out there but it depends when/where he served.
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What is it that he & you are thinking that VA can do? That is something to think about because the benefit that tends to come up most often for VA is their Aide and Attendance program. It pays $ to both the vet and their spouse IF they are financially & medically at need for it.
HOWEVER…
VA A&A is about $1800 a month if they qualify. So it in & of itself will never ever be enough $ to pay for a NH/SNF as those run 8K-15K a month.
BUT,….
VA A&A is really good for extra $ to pay for AL as it’s costs a way less than a NH. And it’s really good to use for those who have too too much in assets, so have to do a spend down to become eligible for LTC Medicaid; as that VA $ helps stretch out their private pay period so they have more choices as to which NH they can go to.
VA also provides for traditional health care, like doctors visits, at VA health centers. And long term residential care & housing as well but it is a JoAnn described as geared to the actual vet.
and VA provides for burial.

So what are you hoping VA can do?
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igloo572 May 29, 2025
For 2025, VA A&A max is $1794 for a vet &/or a spouse if eligible. All income, retirements, pensions are looked at to determine if eligible. It is somewhat similar to what each State does for their own LTC Medicaid program in their looking at the applicant and their spouse’s financial resources.

Process starts with VA form 21-2680. And it can seem daunting. Unfortunately forms like this are flat out something that your Dad and you will have to get used to dealing with. Again what VA is asking for will be similar to what LTC Medicaid or Community based Medicaid programs will ask for with supporting documentation. It’s all about determining the type and amount of resources they have as what is available from VA / Medicaid depends on what their resources are. Resources are their monthly income, their savings & investments, their insurance policies, values on home/land/autos.

I’ve been on this forum a long time and for those couples like your folks what tends to happen is this:
- they each file for their own A&A. And whomever is their POA helps them with this and continues to keep track of all future & updated documents they receive for the following years.
- they both qualify for the maximum A&A as their military pension is smallish as is any SSA retirement income.
- the still able to stay living at home spouse - let’s say it’s the husband - gets the full VA A&A and uses the $ for him to hire a caregiver to enable him to stay living in the home. So between his regular income & his VA A&A$, he is good to cover household and caregiver costs. He is the “Community Spouse”.
- the wife goes into an AL that has a memory care sector. It costs abt 5K a mo. So between her own monthly income, her own VA A&A and 1K from their savings, her costs are covered.
HOWEVER…
- 2 years later, she is determined to need a higher level of care. She now should be in a NH. NHs in her State run 10K a month. She has a 5K shortfall to pay for the NH.
Their savings is under the maximum allowed for a Community Spouse, so he does not have to deplete that $ to pay for her care. His own income is under the maximum for spousal support so he does not himself have to pay for her NH costs.

What she will do is file for LTC Medicaid as that program will cover all the costs for her to be a custodial care resident in a NH.
Her own monthly income - but not her VA A&A - will be paid to the NH as her Share of Cost while her Medicaid application is being processed (“Medicaid Pending”). But his will not as he’s the Community Spouse so he’s needs his own income, his own VA A&A and he keeps all their savings as it’s under the CS maximum allowed (depends on ea State, many do 130K, mine does 158K).
4 months later she is approved for LTC Medicaid. It retro’s back its coverage to the date of her LTC application 4 months ago. No double dipping is allowed under Federal & State program regulations, so VA A&A will stop as now all her care costs are covered by State LTC Medicaid. VA eventually will clawback the A&A for those 4 months BUT will now do their own VA personal allowance to her of $90 a month. Usually the week of the clawback - which can be a month or two after the months after LTC Medicaid is approved - $90 gets deposited for each month of the application process and then a single clawback of all the A&A $ paid while she was Medicaid Pending. It’s important that the A&A does not get spent. A Nh that has VA residents knows this, so they won’t ask for it. But sometimes it isn’t clear to families and they spend it….. don’t do it. It will eventually have to be repaid to the VA.

The paperwork is daunting. Your dad is likely overwhelmed so you will have to help him find what’s needed, keep it organized & sent. VA has regional offices with staff who can help with this. My city has a VA health center complex w/an office that does this. There are Veterans organizations that help as well. You should never pay for assistance to file VA A&A. Good luck & stay focused!
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Your County seat should have a VA office. I would not count on her getting into a VA home unless a Vet. I was asked why I did not place my Mom in one by the VA agent, so must be allowed but those Vets who have service related disabilities, are first in line, then reg vets. My GFs husband served in Viet Nam and could not get in.

I suggest if Mom needs a nursing home, your Dad see about seeing an elder lawyer about splitting their assets. Her split will go to her care and when gone Medicaid can be applied for.
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Thank you.
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Paula, assist your father in calling the VA to speak with a VA counselor about what is available; he will need his service documents. Good luck.
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