My dad is so mean and rude. He alienated everyone around him. I’m tired, too. I had to stand my ground today and told him I was done being his verbal punching bag. He shoved his walker at me and threatened to call a lawyer. He always uses his money as a threat. Since it’s just me and my husband taking care of him, how would I go about getting him in a home and not be cut off financially?
You need to see your own lawyer, and no need to mention it to dad. Find out what your options are.
Please realize that dad's assets are his to do with or assign or bequeath as he wants as long as there are no legal stumbling blocks. We all need to assume that we will have to provide for ourselves and save accordingly, and we'd better. There's a lot of slip between the cup and the lip.
Let him call his lawyer, and you and your husband get on with living and enjoying your life, and quit worrying about your dads money.
You and your husband shouldn't need to have your dads money and his care or lack thereof should have NOTHING to do with an inheritance.
Hopefully you're not living with your dad, and if you are and are that unhappy....move out and call APS on your way out the door. They will come out and do an assessment and take over his care if need be. And quit worrying about your dads money. It's his and not yours, unless he decides to share it with you after he dies.
Is putting up with a mean and rude old man really worth your happiness, just for financial gains?
What is the back story, how did you end up as his live in caregivers?