Mom is in mid to late stages of dementia, she does not remember that her siblings have passed, or that the one that is still alive didn't pass. Her short term memory is very bad, but she does obsess over negative things. I am also pretty sure she is depressed, and the news of losing her son will not help. He lived in another state, and was disabled due to a stroke many years ago. We have not seen him in the past two years because his physical ability to travel declined at about the same rate as my mothers mental ability to travel. Some folks say don't tell her, other's say tell her once, then just go with it if the question comes up, meaning don't make them grieve all over again time after time. My main concern is her quality of life, and I don't want to cause her any heartache if I can avoid it. What I fear is that once word gets out, well meaning family and friend might send sympathy cards to her, and that would also add to her confusion. I have sent an email seeking advice from the director of her facility, perhaps they will have some insights or suggestions.