He put her in an Alzheimer’s and Dementia Facilty. My mom lived in her own home before being placed in the nursing home. She drives her car. She does her own grocery shopping, laundry, goes for manicure/pedicure and hair salon, doctor. My mom wants out of the nursing home. How do I get her out of there?

It sounds like your brother placed your mother in a Skilled Nursing Facility for REHAB purposes, so she could regain her strength after suffering from a debilitating bout of diverticulitis. A stint in rehab normally takes place in a Skilled Nursing Facility and lasts for 20 days, then the patient goes home. Otherwise, it makes no sense that he placed her in a Memory Care facility when she doesn't have dementia or Alzheimer's.........right? Have you spoken to your BROTHER about this? What does HE have to say? Speaking to an ombudsman before you get all the details from your brother doesn't sound like a wise decision. Get all the facts first, then go from there.

If your mother IS there for rehab, let her alone, that's my suggestion. Medicare doesn't pay for rehab for no good reason, nor does a doctor send a patient TO rehab for no good reason. She will receive physical and occupational therapy daily while in rehab, so she can return to her normal daily routine (hopefully) once she gets home. Taking her out prematurely can greatly affect her ability to get around and have the stamina to live independently afterward.

Finally, like Frances said, a SNF is not a prison. If your mother is of sound mind, she can check HERSELF out of there. If her son has guardianship over her because she has dementia and is not of sound mind, then HE gets to make the decisions as to where she lives moving forward.

I just have the feeling you're not getting the whole story here. Talk to your brother, even if you're not on good terms, just to get the complete picture of what's really going on.

Good luck!
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to lealonnie1

It’s not a prison, the facility can’t force her to stay. As long as she is capable of making her own decisions the POA is not valid. A POA allows the nominee to make financial decisions, pay bills. Etc. Does your brother also have a medical POA? That one is what is used to make medical decisions for an incompetent or unconscious person.
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Reply to Frances73

You could call an ombudsman and ask for a review of the situation. Every state has a Long Term Care ombudsman. Get in touch with the one in your mom's state.

You could ask the facility to tell you what a "safe discharge plan" for your mom would entail and try to see if you could get your brother to agree to it.

I don't think your brother could just put your mom in memory care because he felt like it. She would need to have qualified medically for that placement. Doctors would have had to certify that she needs that level of care and was not able to make her own decisions.

If your mom is competent to make her own decisions, she could sign herself out of care. I very much suspect that doctors have determined she is not competent to make her own decisions. But I think an ombudsman might help you figure it all out.
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Reply to Marcia732

If you has the mental capacity she can rescind the POA. She can then assign it to someone else.

Is she in the nursing home for rehab after being sick or is it s permanent placement? What has happened to her home?

Generally a person needs to meet a medical criteria to be placed in a nursing home. Who recommended that she be placed in one?
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Reply to Tothill

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