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My Mother is in hospital after a heart attack and a stroke; we three children have been making decisions together via phone and conference until just this week...when all of a sudden all calls and messages/conferencing stopped.


Just found out that my two siblings authorized my Mother to be admitted to a Nursing Home after we decided that we would try to keep her in hospital for a longer period and studied on how to do that. Mom will only have 95 days of care in the Nursing Home via her Aetna Medicare. She has been in the hospital since August 2nd and was recently moved to the Rehab Floor. After less than one week the staff approached us and said that she was not progressing fast enogh. They have been pushing hard to get her discharged. She is 91.5 years old and has been improving slowly from complete left side paralysis.


During this hospitalization, my Mom's home was mostly/partly vacant so, without notice, my sister, the youngest, had her not-so-reliable and creepy brother-in-law move into my Mom's house...supposedly he is doing yard work because he cannot pay any rent (he only works part-time).. My Mom's home is like her own personal museum, packed with collectibles and her treasures. My sister had this same relative living with her and worked diligently to get him out of HER house. He works as some kind of aid at the same hopsital that my Mom is in. He mostly does wheel chair transport, nothing medical. This man is not stable, cannot maintain employment, has been dismissed from jobs for inappropriate interactions with female co-workers, has been known to use drugs and frequents women of questionable repute.


My Mom's home is in a family neighborhood and he is not a trustworthy inhabitant. Anyone know what my legal rights may be to disengage him from my Mom's home? Being one of three, I am not sure of my footing here. There is no POA in place other than a Medical one. My sister further informed me today that she wants to have this man stay with my Mom at night when she has to be sent home from the Nursing Home after her 95 day eligibility lapses to save money on private care. Of course...he has worked in several facilities on night shifts, but was fired or was allowed to resign from all due to questionable behavior and poor work ethics. My Mom has only ever been cared for by family or the nursing staff, mostly female. She would not be comfortable with this person staying with her...she did not even want him in her house when she was well. I have to admit, I am hurt, but more so, enraged, that this was done, and decidely, behind my back, too!...with an "oh, I thought you knew" kicker was the response I got from my sister...any suggestions???

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I would consult with an Attorney to get legal advice for your jurisdiction. They can explain the law and your options. I agree about asking mother what she wants and if she is competent to make sound decisions about her health, welfare and finances. If she is competent, she can sign a POA that allows you do act on her behalf now, even if she is competent. Or a Durable POA, which comes into play when she is no longer competent.
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Is Mom competent? She can still make her own decisions? If so, your siblings cannot make decisions for her and move someone into her house even if a POA has been assigned. POAs only come into effect if person is incompetent to make own decisions. If Mom is not competent and no financial POA, no one can make decisions for her.

So if Mom understands what is what, she has a right to have man evicted. And hire who she wants.
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I’m wondering if you should go to your mom and ask her to appoint you POA. Is she competent? If not, maybe emergency guardianship. With nothing legal in place, there isn’t much you can do to control what your sibs are doing.

I would do an internet search on this guy. Chances are he has a record. I would be terrified to have him in my house if I were your mother. I wonder how much of her stuff he and your sister have already pocketed.
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