OP says that this is the only thing she was ever expecting to inherit from GM, it’s a family heirloom, and it’s really upsetting for it to go for someone that GM has only known for quite a short while. Understandable!
Perhaps GM could agree for it to be a loan to her friend, while it’s still a bit of a nuisance in her own small space, but for you to have it as a bequest eventually. If so, get it in writing. Best for OP to emphasise the family importance, to be handed down to the youngers in your family, whatever she thinks now of OP.
Its just hard for me because it is the only thing I have left of hers and I hope she is making the right decision to give it to a friend she had only known for 3 years. I am really hurt that she would not want me to have it. She has really turned against me because she is now in a long term facility.
I would give it to the woman your grandmother wants to have it. I would tell her that if she "hates it" you would be willing to keep it and say you offered it to her but she doesn't have room for it, was afraid it would start a fire, whatever.
She does not want it in her long term nursing home because she is afraid someone will steel or knock it over it is an antique from the early 1900 it, plus she is in a very small shared room.
And asked her for the lamp?
Perhaps GM could agree for it to be a loan to her friend, while it’s still a bit of a nuisance in her own small space, but for you to have it as a bequest eventually. If so, get it in writing. Best for OP to emphasise the family importance, to be handed down to the youngers in your family, whatever she thinks now of OP.
Follow grandma's instructions, give the lamp to her friend, do it now.
Or, was that not the issue?