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She always was more loving to my oldest brother who has just died. She is nice to most people but aggressive to me. How do I handle this?

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Willy, your Mom need to get into a routine at the Assisted Living and not depend on you to be there daily. Slowly start cutting back on your time. Mom needs to make friends with others who are there, and to join in the activities. Like geewiz had said, make excuses. Usually Moms understand when you say you have a doctor's appointment [theraputic fib].

I see in your profile that your Mom has Alzheimer's /Dementia, thus she will be going through different phases. Try to ignore the phases the best you can, and just agree with whatever she says. That will make her feel good, and you know in your mind that you had won.
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I see your Mom suffers from dementia. So did mine. I used to arrive in the morning and leave when lunch was being served. There wee no extra seats in the dining area and it left Mom fully occupied. I too found it difficult to just leave so this was an excuse. Ditto on grocery shopping, doctor's/dentist's appointments etc.
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