My mother is physically fit but doesn’t make sense anymore. She knows me and immediately starts talking about her bicycle, her former neighbors, and things and items that make no sense. She is worried about someone taking her home and is constantly trying to go to bed. Her body houses my mother but her mind is totally confused.
Wishing you the best of luck.
Its not weird she has memory problems.
Be elated she’s ambulatory.
Maybe you need some respite care, so you get a break?
It’s not a Benjamin Button movie 🎥
Dementia isn’t going to improve.
You need to take her to a neurologist, to see what type of Dementia she has. Then, you need to start preparing for the progression of the disease.
She will need help with eating, dressing, toileting, and more. You will need to adapt your own life to care for her full-time, or you will need to seek the help of a home caregiver, or you will need to search for a nursing home. You will need to obtain POA.
Either way, you need to get out of denial and start to prepare now.
While there can be "step downs" with some forms of dementia, this sounds more like she might have a UTI or an imbalance. I would start with a simple check up with her doctor, including a urine culture and blood work. This can rule out UTIs, other infections or imbalances in her blood due to medications or lack of vitamins/minerals, etc. If nothing shows up, perhaps something to calm her, like anti-anxiety meds might stabilize her. I wouldn't put her through an MRI - those can be scary or claustraphobic for elders, esp those with dementia. The suggestions of neurologists seem a bit overboard, if you already know she has dementia.
While this could also be some form of sun-downing, which usually occurs later in the day/early evening, but can be any time of day, it still sounds suspiciously like a UTI. While this may sound crazy, it isn't. When I first joined the forum years ago, I would see suggestions of testing for UTIs and thought it was odd. Until my mother had her first UTI in the MC unit. Oh boy.... Sudden onset of agitation, insisting she had to get out, go home, had guests coming and set off every door alarm multiple times!
In her case, it was likely vascular dementia (we never did any major testing.) Short term memory was shot (lots of repetition) and loss of capabilities like managing finances and cooking (impact on executive functions?) Otherwise, she seemed like any other "normal" older woman (she was about 90-91 at the noticeable onset.) Once we were able to get her into the MC, she was "stable" for about 9 months - that's when the "step down" occurred. She still knew who I was, even well beyond that, but she started asking about her mother (gone 40+ years by then) and her previous home (sold 25+ years prior.) THIS is normal progression - no real odd behavior, just stepping back in time as more recent memories are impacted. She remained at that 40+ years ago stage for several years before strokes took her.
On the flip side, sudden onset of behavior changes generally indicate something is going on. In many cases, the "usual" signs of UTIs or other infections aren't present or are interpreted by their malfunctioning brains as something else. As noted, mom's behavior was certainly not normal for her. She was like that for several days until we could get her on antibiotics and an anti-anxiety med. The anti-anxiety was the lowest dose and was just enough to take the "edge" off - she wasn't "doped" up, it worked first time, every time and didn't need to be weaned off (Lorazepam, only used during the UTI treatment.)
Once treated, she was fine and didn't need any meds to "control" her. Please DO check for UTI (you can try a dip stick test, but sometimes these show negative, so culture is best.) NOTE: the second UTI mom had a few years after that resulted in night time bed wetting, despite max briefs with a max pad inserted and toileting before bed. Wetting = soaking everything, so yes, UTIs do very odd things to elders, esp those with dementia!!
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