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He has always been a control freak. Aging has set him off. He hates not being in control...yet he is unable to handle a lot of things. He wants to just sit around and order people to do things for him. He complains nonstop and attacks anyone that disagrees with him (on just about anything). He just got kicked out of his lunch group — for punching another member. Of course, it’s ALL the other guy’s fault (the story changes again and again). My mom (82) bears the brunt of his anger...as do any of his kids. The thing is...they’ve no money and can not afford much. I’ve helped financially for years, and now my sister and her husband have made the deposit on an independent living community. The thing is, we’re worried about him getting into fights (verbal or physical) and getting them both kicked out! If that happens...we’re at a loss. We want to help my mom (and actually, my dad too). But can’t have him derailing any efforts on their behalf. We can’t afford it - financially or emotionally. What are our options for our dad? We don’t want to be mean...we want him safe...but can’t take him in...and can’t DO this much longer. How do you commit an elderly person? It’s horrible to say...but need to explore next steps. I’m sure it’s coming.

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Polar bear, National Association of Elder Law Attorneys.
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It's the certification organization for eldercare lawyers. Great answer, Becky!
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Becky-what is NAELA ? Thanks
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Get him to a geriatric psychiatrist. There may be a medication that would help stabilize his anger issues. This doctor may be able to tell you the steps for admission to a geriatric psych hospital, if that is the level of care he needs. If they have no money, you should consult a NAELA attorney to guide you through the process of applying for Medicaid in your state, usually a lengthy process. This could help with payment of psychiatric admission, or other residential options.
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