My 86 year old mom is in hospital barely able to open her eyes, confused. How did this come on so suddenly?

I would say the high blood sugar level is causing most of her problems and worsen her confusion. I know people are living into there 90s and even over 100 but the 80s are when the body just starts giving out. My Moms fall and head injury at 83 just made those small signs of Dementia go into full blown Dementia which she declined from on a constant bases.

Please don't feel guilty for having to leave and take care of yourself, and family. You all matter too.
Your mom has lived a full life and she wouldn't want you or your family now suffering in any way because of her.

My late husband spent a lot of time over the years in the hospital for various reasons and because of his limited speech, I felt that I needed to be there as much as possible to be his voice and advocate.
However I knew my limitations as well, and how important getting proper rest was, so I would usually be at the hospital by 8:00 a.m. and stay until about 7:00 p.m. or so and then leave to sleep in my own bed.
The hospital knew how to reach me if something came up, and I was able to sleep much better in my own bed than in a chair in a hospital room.

So be kind to yourself and give yourself some grace. You're only human like the rest of us.
I'm sorry that your mom has taken a sudden decline, but that often happens after a fall in an elderly person.
It may be time to think about bringing hospice on board now, so your mom can be kept comfortable for the duration of time she has left.
Praying for God's peace and comfort to be with you all.

I know that somewhere in your mind you have known all along that the aging thing is happening?

Things can happen VERY suddenly. In the case of my brother I got a call from all the way across the state saying "You know your brother is in the hospital, don't you?"
In the case of my Dad he sat in his easy chair to watch Larry King Live (Monica Lewinsky was on), took a sigh and was gone.

It sounds as though your mom is very ill indeed and this is something you can only take a day at a time. I am so very sorry. Guilt is inappropriate in that you didn't cause this and can't fix it. Guilt implies responsibility, and you aren't responsible for this. The best G-word now is grief, and anticipatory grief. If your mother survives this her life may be altered. I am so terribly sorry, but this is just now one day at a time. Be certain to take care of YOURSELF so you can stay strong. I hope you have a support system and will update us.

Having been through deaths of both elderly parents and hospitalizations of other relatives, I can reassure you that I’ve never seen any benefit of staying with them in a medical facility all night. Please don’t guilt yourself about it.

Your mom needs her rest. The medical staff can take care of her. You need your rest, and you have a job requiring your attention. Also, you need to be clearheaded every day so that you can deal with decisions and demands that will come up regarding your mom’s illness.

Not only that, but you can stay with them all night, get virtually no sleep, pick up the TV remote for them every time they lose it, make sure they sip water, and feel like hell by 7a.m. when it’s time to go to work for 8 hours. And they won’t even remember you were there. Truth.

Mamadrama, (((hugs))).

I went back to your other posts; it seems your mom has some kind of frontal lobe dementia, has started making wild accusations, has terrible mood swings.

Your blood pressure has been sky high trying to "fix" all this.

Mom has lived a long life. She now suffers from an incurable brain deterioration that is life limiting.

Is it maybe time for comfort care and hospice?

When my mom, 4 1/2 years into dementia post stroke, fell at her NH, was in intractable pain and rapidly becoming less and less responsive, we called in hospice.

No more ambulances and ERs, no more fixing stuff.

Make sure you give it some thought.

She is where she needs to be, no reason for the guilt trip, it serves no purpose.

Be patient, see what tomorrow brings, at her age, some acceptance will be required by you. She has lived a long life and medical teams are not miracle workers.

Sending support your way!

There are several participants on this forum who are seasoned RNs and they can give you some ideas. At 86, yes things can go south fast since our bodies at that age are already not in peak condition. Please try not to dwell in guilt, it will exhaust you and none of this is your fault. Your Mom needs your advocacy and confidence. Maybe call in other siblings (even if out of state) to help, if you have any trustworthy and willing ones.

Does your Mom have a Living Will? Are you her MPoA or Medical Representative? Does she have a DNR? Spend time finding this paperwork to submit to the hospital admin, if you think she has any of it. Hang in there!