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Found my mam in the reclining chair, in a horizontal position, food on her table at her feet , trying, to no avail, to reach for food. The dinner was nearly over, staff completely ignoring mam. Mam is 90 yo, non verbal, impaired hearing, lost mobility. Seeing her trying to access food made very upset and cry. Something similar happens all the time when my ex colleagues ( I used to work in this home many years ago,and my face did not fit) are on duty. When the new staff are on duty, everything is fine. Am I right raising concern? Thank you in advance

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Yes, of course you are correct.
I am not certain if you are saying "certain people" are involved in this neglect. If you have direct experience due to having worked there, then I would supply their names to administration and let them know how and when you observed this. It would have been better done when you were working there, not when your mother was a client, but better late than never. I would preface any complaints by telling admin you worked in this very facility and know the struggles of feeding EVERYONE at the same time.

Your mother is in are now and she requires being set up for meals at the least. To try to swallow anything while reclining, I know you understand having done this work, is dangerous and could lead to choking, even to death. The elderly have a very poor swallow response.
It could be that your mother needs meal assists. You will know with a staff of likely 1-10 that not all can be fed who need it in a timely manner. This is just how things are, and must be lived with as one lives with all the other imperfections of in-facility care.

Sorry, this is a worry for you, and sad to stand witness to where your mother is concerned. I hope you will approach admin calmly, recognizing the issues THEY face trying to give care, but honestly and with the concern that one person choking on food delivered and sitting in this manner would disrupt a whole lot more than the noontime meal.

Best of luck. Hope you will update us.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Yes, you have every right to be concerned. You can seek help with the administrator of the facility with your concerns and if you need to you can report the issue to your local department of aging. If you need further guidance you can also discuss the issue with the department of health or get guidance from an elderly advisor or determine why the problem occurred. There is also a hotline if you feel that there is elder abuse suspected or neglect.
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Reply to Senior8
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Of course you should raise your concerns to the appropriate people in your mums facility as that is just so wrong on so many levels.
And because most if not all facilities are short staffed these days, you may have to time your visits at mealtime so you yourself can feed her, or pay to have someone come to feed her.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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Of course you are right to raise a concern, it not only made it impossible for your mother to feed herself it is a choking hazard if the staff was actually feeding her... I'd be livid! I wouldn't name anybody though, they'll know perfectly well who was on duty. And if this continues happening often then document; isn't it handy that today we all have a phone in our pockets.
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Reply to cwillie
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