What were the key factors in deciding to move your LO from AL to skilled nursing? Did they want to go?
My mother is 85, end stage copd and chf. She has been in assisted living for 6.5 years and after another Hospital stay due to a small heart attack and pneumonia last month she is now back at rehab. She has been in the verge of death so many times over the past 7 years - it is a miracle she is still on this earth.
She has been in rehab about a month and has made very little progress this time. She says she wants to ‘get better’ and likes to do the pt and ot with their therapists but when the aids try to get her to to walk; use the bathroom etc she refuses. She says she is tired and just can’t do it. She says she is unable to walk or get up on her own and prefers to release her bladder in bed vs trying to use the toilet or commode. She makes no effort to dress herself and only does her nighttime routine if the set everything up for her and hand it to her. It’s like she’s lost all her motivation to take care of herself yet is so pleased for everyone else to do it.
While she IS very sick and would meet the criteria for hospice for a few different things she has been in this state for years. The nurse director says mom can do more but is choosing not to and while she did improve the first 2 weeks she has actually declined the past 5 days. This is not surprising - mom is not one to push herself and is very happy to sit in bed and watch tv day after day But I’m just struggling to understand if she really CAN’T do more if if she just doesn’t WANT to.
My brother insists it doesn’t matter - the end result is still the same.
We had a care zoom call today and the rehab said they can justify 2 more weeks to evaluate but at that point Medicare will no longer cover her stay.
She loves her assisted living place and had friends and things to do and it makes me so sad to think of her sitting in a bed in a nursing home for the rest of her life. She seems content to stay so I’m not sure why it bothers me so much.
she has the resources and will private pay so that is not the issue. I think it’s how much do you push and encourage vs step back?
She does not want to die at all -I think she is just tired and doesn’t want to put any effort.