My mom currently is living by herself but we are thinking about her moving in with us. What should we be concerned about if we chose to move her in?

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Okay, my mom wants to give it one more try, of living by herself in her home of 45 years. She is 88, uses a walker. If it doesn't work out, or time goes by and it stops being possible, she may move in with me and my husband.
We have extra room upstairs, but no downstairs bathrooms, and we have stairs, which she cannot do. She would be confined upstairs unless my hub & me carry her down. We might get a motorized stairlift, but my mom isn't real mobile, by nature.
I could give her her meds, food, and she goes to bathroom alone.
Does this all sound ok, or like a catastrophe in the making?

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I agree with ejbunicorn , My mom also moved in with us and now needs bathing, pills, and is incontinent, etc but I wouldnt ever give her up for all the money in the world! My Mom also loved her home and wanted to stay until the dementia was so bad she forgot who's home she was at. THe best gift you can give them is a warm, safe, happy home, they dont need space, only a bedroom and a bathroom, they can even eat in their room if you want. Prepare yourself for very hard work, lots of singing and laughing, and memories that you will cherish forever ! The only thing I can say is that your Mom pays for a bathroom to be put in your downstairs with her money or get a commode, you should also get compensated, and she needs to pay for weekend caregivers so you can have the best of both worlds, your mom, and...your life.
Hugs to you all.
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i think it can work,especially if you get a stair lift. since she is home alone now,she will still have some privacy with a room and bathroom up stairs. she probably would not want to be in the center of things anyway,. as long as you have no problem with stairs it will work.
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Not a good idea, in my opinion. Is there an Assisted Living facility nearby? I know it's costly, but weigh the options. I think that you'll find that a nice facility outside of your home is more comfortable for all concerned.
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What if there was a fire? Even if you were home at the time could you get her out?
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Check into buying a 2d hand chair lift. Craigs list is a good place to start. Typically, these things aren't used very hard. We were in the same situation and moved my mom in. It's been hard on my marriage and I must make sure that hubby and I get time away on a regular basis. When it gets to be too much, you have to make the decision to move her, regardless if it drains her funds or not. Medicaid will take over. You have to look out for yourself and your husband first.
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i think it can work,especially if you get a stair lift. since she is home alone now,she will still have some privacy with a room and bathroom up stairs. she probably would not want to be in the center of things anyway,. as long as you have no problem with stairs it will work.
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Hi, I will let you no my story and it might or might not help. My mom lived at her house on her own up until she was 91 years old. But in the meantime she was falling a lot. I wanted her to live with me so i could take care of her but she would not leave her home being there for 60 years. I wish i would have insisted she come with me because she wound up having a stroke and fell with 3 fractured ribs when i went over and found her that way. After her rehab i brought her to my house. all of our bedrooms are upstairs so we decided to put her on the main floor in the living room and installed a shower for her which did not cost a whole lot of money. It is working out perfect. for her and I. But keep in mind I take care of her 24/7. The work never ends. I hired a few sitters to watch over her when I need to do errands which does help but i have no life right now but that's ok. my mom would have done the same for me. She cant talk or use the right side of her body so she is in the wheelchair a lot right now which the chair fits nicely through all of the doors. She is starting to get some of her motion back but at her age its hard. keep in mind your on your feet all day taking care of your mother dealing with alot of bowel movements, washing a lot, dinners, up in the middle of the night, therapy, dr. appointments etc etc. I am extremely tired all of the time and there are also 4 other siblings that do absolutely nothing to help out. It got to the point where i decided enough is enough and i just focused on my moms well being and not them which makes me feel better. She still owns her home but eventually when I have time it will be sold and that money will be used for her care at my home if and when I need it. I will never put her in a nursing home or assisted living home. I seen way too many things with the elderly. Hope this helps and I wish you well with your decision with your mom. God Bless...
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My mom lives with me and I am her caretaker, when she first moved in years ago had many diseases but was still pretty good, could bathe, walk alone etc, now at only 74, she uses a cane, walker and wheelchair, has just started with dementia, I have to bathe her, cook, clean, all her meds, checking, taxes and any thing else you can think of, I love my mom, she is my best friend and will continue to care for her as long as I can, let me tell you, there will be times when you want to scream, runaway and hide, the stress can be overwhelming, I do alot of praying, just remember to be loving and to also take care of yourself, if you find it to be too much, look into caregivers coming in to your home to provide care for your mom so you can take some time for you self, also if it gets to the point you cannot provide the care she needs, then a nursing home will have to be a consideration, will keep you in my prayers, hugs
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It just does not sound like a workable situation. Perhaps you should look for another solution rather than mom living with you.
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The bottom line is, I got discouraged hearing from ALF that no matter what I said about money, they said it wasn't enough. I could not keep trying. Mom was not social, even when she was young, and staying home is what she always did.
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