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I am POA for my mom and want to move her where I live in a different state... We left wednesday and had a great trip. She was bery relaxed and enjoyed the 7.5 hr drive... I have noticed that being here has givin her a new look on her face. She interacts with my grandkids and enjoys being in a new environment.. at night and if she is over tired she will get sundowners and aggitated easily.. I am not happy where she lives in an apartment- she is depressed and wont do much without a lot off effort.. we have had some issues with my siblings n care that wasnt givin like it should have. I have had APS called on me out of spite and false accusations even though a sibling did not care for mom n hwr finances or hygeine.... We are here and wonder if it would be easier and less stressful to just stay, find a new place for us and have her stuff sent down... I know I am giving her better care than. Ever and have been told by several how wonderful mom looks and how happy she seems.. I just wanna bring her home with me where she will be surrounded by grown kids n little kids horses n dogs and be able to sit outside n enjoy the fresh country air.... pls any advice will be great !!!!!

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I agree with the honeymoon phase, after a time she may show more agitation. Moving her may confuse her more, she may miss the family that live near her apartment. She may do very well with the move. If you are sure she is not receiving the care she should, you can try moving her in with your family. Call the Area Agency on Aging or Bureau of Senior Services for information about senior programs, even in home help. Check into an adult day program-visit it first to check it out, you can take your mom for a short visit to see how she likes it. I find day programs a great resource. It's admirable for you to want to care for your mother and want to move her in. Make sure your family understand dementia an what to expect. You can contact the Alzheimer's Association for information and training to understand dementia. You have to weight all the options. At some point, you need to recognize your mom may need to move into an assisted living facility. Not only as her POA, but as her daughter you will need to do what is in her best interest & make decision she would have made if she were able to fully understand all that is happening. Having her full time is different from having her for a visit. Seek the caregiver support you need from your local Area Agency on Aging.
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Thanks for the input... we have not moved yet.... i will discuss with her dr and contact medicaid.. she does have private insurance.... our trip lasted 9 days and it was amazing n challenging at times but with my oldest son n GF n several of his friends whom adopted me years ago as their mom, it made things easier... they luv her n me and are all wanting us there to give her lots of love n care..... and give mom n i both nreaks from each other.... my heart n my sons spirit tell me to bring her where she will be forever surrounded by people who will luv n care for her....
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I think you still have Medicare because that's federal, but Medicaid regs could vary with residence requirements, etc. On the other hand, with Medicaid pending, you typically have things back paid from the date of application once it comes through.
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Very very important point Pam S makes.

Moral: if you ARE going to go ahead, make sure you have planned every detail and take it one careful step at a time.
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You do realize that her Medicare/Medicaid healthcare Benefits are run state by state and right now you have no coverage in the new location??
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Grandkid visits mean the world to our folks. IF you can do it, having Mom somewhere that is possible could be great, again, not necessarily in your home if sundowner's is going to be a huge stressor on everyone, but near you, absolutely. APS spite calls happen and are usually recognized as such promptly, that alone should not be a big barrier for you. I mean they can tell if someone is being taken care of and don't typically side with someone making phony reports, though they are obligated to investigate each one no matter how many times it's done.
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Sigu, I wouldn't say don't do it, but please do heed all the advice especially Pam's about the 'honeymoon' period. Really think it through. Think about how old she is, how old you are, how long you'd be able to go on giving her all the care and attention she needs, not forgetting that she'll need more and more specialist care as time goes on.

If it's true that where she's living at the moment, in her own apartment, she is lonely, neglected and struggling, then it could be that moving to be near you could be beneficial. But don't rush into it: get advice, think through all the details, be sure you can realistically manage the tough times there are bound to be when you're caring for an elderly person.

And don't forget there are other options too, such as her living nearby but not in your home.

Best of luck, and meanwhile I'm glad your mother is having a great time being with your family for her visit. I like the image of her sitting outside in the fresh air and sunshine!
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Thanks for opinion.. I hope with her in the early stage where she talks to me alot bout the issues that siblings are causing her and I, she agrees to move and I hope to keep her active as she can ......
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I'm confused? Did she already move in with you? Why would APS get called on you if she lives 7.5 hours away and other family cares for her?
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It also could be very difficult for her emotionally to be away from her home - family, friends, familiar places.
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Visits are nice, but don't give up her apartment just yet. There is a "honeymoon phase" that will last a month, then she will return to agitation and the situation will deteriorate after that. Been there. Done that. Check some other posts, after a month they demand to go back and get ugly about it.
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