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My niece, who is not a nice person, put my mother who is 97 in a nursing home. She is the POA, and I understand that. My sister's name is listed at the nursing home to call to inform her of anything that is going on with my mother. Sarah, my niece, did not list my name. I just came back from the nursing home crying because my mother was in so much pain. She had a burn on her thigh which was terrible and the nurses there only said that my name was not on the list so they could not tell me what happened to my mother. My sister, who never responds to my calls, never tells me anything. Do I have any rights to find out how my mother is and how she got that terrible burn on her thigh. My niece has disassociated herself from the whole entire family, including cousins and aunts and everyone. My mother loves when I visit her and I have been very close to her in relationship always. I'm so upset right now.

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You don’t say what happened between your niece, your sister and the rest of the family that caused them to distance themselves from the rest of the family but things like this usually don’t happen for no reason. Anyway, you can still visit your mom, right? You haven’t been banned from visiting her, just learning the details of her care. As long as she’s being cared for, you probably should just take it day by day. Go visit her as often as you can. Sometimes, when you become well-known in a facility, you pick up little tidbits of information. Do not disrespect your sister or your niece to the staff, keep your own counsel. As long as you can spend time with your mom, that’s really all that is important.
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Would mom be able to sign a HIPPA release? If so, then the NH staff would be able to respond to your requests.
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I AM my mom's POA and half the time I can't get a good answer to my questions, recently her forearm was bruised and no one seems to know what happened. If you are aware of abuse you can contact the proper authorities (ombudsman?), but if she is otherwise well cared for you need to let it go.
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anonymous848330 Oct 2018
My sister finally sent me a text saying she spilled hot coffee on herself. Why would they serve it so hot to a blind woman? I'm not really worried about the Nursing home as I think they are treating her fine, I'm just upset that just because my niece doesn't like me because I wouldn't let her live in my house free, that she makes it hard for me to find out updates on my mother.
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