My Mom is 99 years old. She suffers from mild dementia. She is very aware of her surroundings and is still able to carry on a conversation. When you ask her questions about things, she can usually answer in a clear concise fashion, however, her short term memory is very sketchy. She will often not be able to remember events that she witnessed that day, or earlier that week, but she is still able to remember most everything about her life and her family. Many many years ago, when my Mom was of a sound mind and body, she established a living will which includes clear directions that she is to stay in her home as long as possible, and that it is her wish to die in her home. She has lived in the same home for over sixty years. I was granted power of attorney and guardianship in her living will. My sister did not approve of her living in her home and took the matter to court, attempting to have Mom's guardianship transferred from me to her. The courts chose to grant the power to make decisions for her care to a neutral third party. My mom's living will was honored and she was allowed to stay living in her home. About six months ago, Mom fell and broke her hip. She has been in a nursing home ever since. If my sister and I agree, then she and I can make decisions for Mom, however, if we do not agree, the decision is in the hands of the court appointed third party. My sister wants her to stay there. I want to see Mom at home, as is clearly stated as her wishes in her living will. Mom still has the financial resources to pay for full-time in-home care. I am firmly convinced that she would receive better attention, better care, if she was at home with a one on one care giver, rather than in a community of people who all need a great deal of assistance, far more assistance that what Mom requires. I am exploring what legal options are available. I am fighting to see that my Mom's wishes be honored so that she can live the rest of her days with dignity. She is very unhappy in the nursing home. Every time I visit, she tells me that she wants to go home. The food they feed her is just awful! She tells me she is hungry, but she will eat very little of the mush they serve. She can hold the spoon and feed herself, but will only eat if you spoon the slop they call food into her mouth. The staff does not spoon feed her, so she just sits in front of her meals and eats almost nothing. She is virtually starving to death. She was tiny before she fell and now she is just skin and bones. Before the fall, she was able to walk quite well on her own. Now she is wasting away, left to sit all day long. I have observed that when I tell a nurse that my Mom has expressed a need to use the restroom, it is usually close to ten minutes before anyone is able to help her because the nursing staff is always busy caring for the other patients in her wing that need far more care than she does. Please, do you have any advice for me about how to handle this situation? With the help of my attorney, I am preparing a petition to the third party demanding that the wishes my Mom stated in her living will be honored. I know that caring for her in her home is a daunting task, and it will be very expensive. The care she receives now is costing over $100,000 a year and the money is coming straight out of her trust account. Her health coverage only paid for the first few weeks after the fall. If she did not have the means to pay for the home, she would be out on the street. For the kind of money she is paying out now, she could surely get better care at home. If we do not help her get home, she will die of starvation in that home and the doctors will just call it "natural causes." She deserves so much better than this. She deserves to have her wishes honored. Many thanks!!