How do we deal with the frequent waking to assist Mom?

We also have the problem with frequent trips to the bathroom during the night and had frequent UTI's. My Mom was referred to a urogynecologist for testing and treatment. They took pictures of the inside of her bladder, it was very inflamed. Also did an input/output study for her bladder to see if she was emptying. The doc put her on a prophylactic antibiotic, methenamine (for the inflamation) and toviaz for the overactive bladder. Toviaz did not work that well for her so doc switched to Mybetriq about a month ago which seems to be working much better for her. She hasn't had a UTI this year.

See if you have a urogynecologist in your area and you should have Mom checked for a UTI as well. Could be the reason for the frequent bathroom trips or not completely emptying the bladder.

Would it be possible to limit liquids up to 4 hours prior to her going to bed for the night? See if that will help.

Companies make night-time pads that she can wear but I bet she would still attempt to wake you up to help her as one wouldn't like the idea of peeing in one's bed, especially since she is still quite alert.

Have her see her doctor or if your Mom has a urologist, as there are pills that help eliminate that constant feeling like you have to go right now.

PS I would not go with the catheter Pam as she is still alert and it would probably distress her too much and possibly lead to bladder spasms and she would still wake up and fuss. They are very useful in end of life care when the patient becomes too weak to get up out of bed and can understand the need or is semi conscious.

There is a fair chance your mother has a bladder or urinary tract infection. Check it out.

As a side note, my mother used to go to the bathroom more than she needed to because she thought she had to go. She was confused about the feelings. However, she does actually need to go several times a night. She went to the incontinence clinic and they said that is normal for her age of 86 but they did give tips like the one someone else gave about not drinking anything for four hours before going to bed.

The incontinence clinic checked her for UTIs and such, too, but the overall issue is that my mother needed someone to really talk this all out, with. She does wear depends but mostly she changed her habits and also talking it all out helped her understand that she doesn't need to keep getting up - she was worried about wetting the bed and she really doesn't need to worry about that.

My godmother was waking a few times a night to go to the bathroom. I talked to our doctor who put her on medication that has helped. I give it to her in the PM, and now she is only getting up once and sometimes not at all. Unfortunately, she has early dementia, so she is still waking me up with her yelling and talking out loud.

My advise is to talk to her doctor and see if there is any medication he can give her. Until then, I use depends and also the overnight pads if she does have an accident, plus I have a pad on her bed.

Definitely this issue should be addressed by her doctor.

If it cannot be resolved, I suggest getting in-home help at night, or considering placement in a care center. You cannot be a safe, effective caregiver if you don't get sufficient sleep!

a UTI sounds very likely. I have a potty chair right by my mother's bed which seems to work quite well. It's easier to empty a potty chair than to get up so much at night.

First, stop all liquids after about 5 p.m. She will have time to urinate before going to bed. Walmart sells a pad with three layers that urine will not go through and you can wash it. I bought one for one of our dogs since she leaks sometime. (Yes, I know the dogs are not supposed to sleep with us). If she can tolerate it, Oxytrol sold at Walmart over-the-counter will prevent having to urinate quite as frequently. I tried one pill, it worked with the stoppage of urine, however, I got a migraine (a side effect), but for about $14 it is worth a try. It is a patch worn on the abdomen, so it is not pill form. There are other meds a doctor can prescribe, but the simplest way to curtail nocturia is limiting liquids 4 to 5 hours prior to bedtime. Let us hear what happens...

Dad is the same. Then started waking thinking it was daytime in middle of night. Already on generic flomax. He uses self stick pads inside of pull up depends so he can change them himself. He does this more now after getting redness on his penis. MD started Mirazapam (generic for remeron). She chose this for its limited interference with blood pressure and other meds. He seems to wake less. I also try to stop liquids at 7, he starts his bed time routine at 9. I think he has the urge to pee because he has prostate cancer, and the tumor is pretty large now. (he is 93 with a weak heart).

It does sound like your mom may have a urinary track infection (UTI) and only the meds from the MD cure that. After UTI is not a concern, give her a glass of non sugar cranberry juice every single day to prevent bacteria regrowth. Also make sure she is not having caffeine too late in the day. It is a diuretic and one cup can last 8 hours before clearing the system. Dad has accepted hot coco (Swiss Miss no sugar).

Good luck. I know what years of interrupted sleep can do to you.