Ok, my sister and I decided that mother at 86 was no longer able to stay in her home alone. We split the responsibility by her living with me 21 days and her for the 10 days a month my husband I'd home. She has accepted the situation but is extremely stubborn about such things as taking a shower ( we have both provided shower seats and hand held nozzles as she cannot get in or out of a bathtub). She won't bathe unless we make her and it is always a battle. Then she takes the shortest shower in the history of showers. 3 minutes tops. She refuses to wash her hair more than once a month. Refuses to go to beauty shop to get hair done. Tries to cut her own hair leaving her looking ridiculous. Refuses to use her cane unless constantly reminded to do so. ( she has already fallen once). She has numbness in her feet so she is very unstable on her feet. REFUSES to use a walker. Eats crazy things if we are jot around to prepare her meals. ( eggs and peanut butter together ugh). Wears the same clothes for days on end and doesn't care about her appearance in public. She was always very particular about her appearance and this just floors us!. If we push these issues she pretends her blood pressure is going up and refuses to discuss the situation. She is mean to the great grands and loathes our husbands. Help! I'm at my wits end on how to effectively get her to cooperate!