The answers concerning hallucinations in dementia are good, but the first thing I thought of when I read this was Charles Bonnet syndrome, which is related to vision loss.
Ask if it is comforting to see him. Have a conversation about her memories of him. Start with how they met. There is an App- Story Corps I believe, that can hep with conversations with the elderly.
TOTALLY validate what she sees!! Depending on your relationship with mom, heres a few ideas that might get you thinking of some snappy comebacks. "isnt it nice to see dads face everyday?, I find it comforting.", or more humorously, "yeh mom, isnt that neat,? do you know what it wouldve cost us to have his image printed up? dad gave us a freebie!" or "He loves you so much he is still keeping an eye on you, isnt that comforting/deep love?." Or "til death do us part was part of your vows, guess he kept his word and isnt going anywhere yet.", "I hope I have someone that still loves me enough to stick around when Im 93".....
If its not comforting, offer to place something else on the wall(s) where she sees the image.After 23 years, I dont think the images are going anywhere, so the old expression "if you cant beat em, join em" might offer you some comfort. My mom would bring things up that she was in disagreement with my dad over (several years after he passed). The first time I said hes dead and that did nothing to help the discussion. The next time I presented a logical counter argument that he would have made in as close to his words as I could come up with, and she finally gave up the topic after being reminded ("remember dad said...") a few times that day. The more it sounded like dads words, the more comforted she became..... Does she have memory deficits or is shes "ok" other than seeing dad's images?
I agree with going along with hallucinations and delusions, unless they are painful to the person having them.
I don't agree that seeing a loved one is a sign the end is near. My husband saw his late brother very early in the disease, about 10 years before he died. That is because in the progression of the kind of dementia he had, hallucinations typically come first. When a person sees loved ones from his past probably depends a lot on how the dementia is progressing. It could be any time.
My experience was a little different in that at times Mom thought I was my Dad...and he passed in 1975. It was upsetting at first but I dealt with it by just going along and answering her questions as if I were him. If that made her happy it was ok with me. Not easy for me...none of this is...but that appear worked.
I agree with the others but you could als say that she must miss him terribly. Ask her what it's like to see him. What he says to her.How it feels to see him. What is her favorite memory with him. Get her talking. Sometimes it's a coping skill.
If its not comforting, offer to place something else on the wall(s) where she sees the image.After 23 years, I dont think the images are going anywhere, so the old expression "if you cant beat em, join em" might offer you some comfort.
My mom would bring things up that she was in disagreement with my dad over (several years after he passed). The first time I said hes dead and that did nothing to help the discussion. The next time I presented a logical counter argument that he would have made in as close to his words as I could come up with, and she finally gave up the topic after being reminded ("remember dad said...") a few times that day. The more it sounded like dads words, the more comforted she became.....
Does she have memory deficits or is shes "ok" other than seeing dad's images?
I don't agree that seeing a loved one is a sign the end is near. My husband saw his late brother very early in the disease, about 10 years before he died. That is because in the progression of the kind of dementia he had, hallucinations typically come first. When a person sees loved ones from his past probably depends a lot on how the dementia is progressing. It could be any time.