My mother is saying nasty, sexual things to the staff at the rehab she's at.


My mother is saying nasty ,sexual things to the staff at the rehab she's at ..I have never heard such nasty piggy language come from her mouth ..besides saying nasty things she's telling staff while I'm there that I'm sleeping with them and she is hostile it's embarrassing and she is also hitting staff and just plain the heck do I handle this? This is unlike her and the psych dr came in and started her on depakote , I hope it starts kicking in soon , the other dr previously put her on seroquel and it was horrible..ughhh , she's only been on depakote for 3 days ...I cannot take this awful nasty piggy stuff she says do I get her to stop being so mean and nasty ....? Help !!! Seroquel was not the med for her ,,I hope the depakote starts working soon

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ohmeowzer, nothing you can do is going to stop Mom from saying these things. It is the dementia that is causing this, and dementia does not change with reasoning, teaching, or tough love. Sometimes drugs can control some dementia symptoms. Seroquel works for many, but not for your mom. Depakote is effective for some -- let's hope it works for your mom. If not, have the doctor keep trying.

To me, the hitting her caregivers is more serious than her speech, and I certainly hope a drug can calm her down and prevent this!

It is understandable that her piggy language is very upsetting for you. Keep firmly in mind that this is Not Your Fault. There is no need for you to be embarrassed over what your mother does. You have no control over this.

In a very real sense, this is Not Your Mother's Fault, either. It is due to the damage in her brain. It is impossible to become an adult without those words and those images entering our brains. We have strong social/moral filters that keep us from using the words. Social filters are among the first casualties of dementia.

I never heard my husband use a cuss word until he had dementia. Obviously those kinds of words were in his brain all along, but he used restraint when he was well.

Keep working with the doctor to find a reasonable chemical restraint on mom's speech and behavior. If depakote is not it, keep trying. And try very hard not to take mom's outrageous statements personally, or to feel as if you had said these things. Not Your Fault. Not Mother's Fault. The blame is squarely on the brain damage caused by dementia.
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Yes she had one and it's all better , wahhhhh my mom who,was a nun before she married my dad is now a piggy 🐷 mouth..oh the doc just saw her in the hospital I'm a RN  , I asked him to stop,by and see her while she was being treated for a UTI ..he just said it was her moderate dementia and put her on depakote... I thought her days of embarrassing me were over ....apparently not ..ugh I just don't know what to say to get her to stop saying such piggy 🐷 things ...omg 
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Has she been tested for a uti? I'm assuming yes, since apparently this has happened before.

Hoping psych consult goes well.
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