My Mother is refusing additional PT Rehab. What do I do?

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She wants to be discharged home. My Birth Mother is in a LTAC Hospital unit after an ICU stay. She still cannot get up out of the bed and walk, she is receiving VENT weaning and is on a trach collar. She is BIPOLAR, she has multiple conditions, Coronary Heart Failure, Acute Kidney Injury, Diabetes, Bipolar, Depression. Since she gave me up (age of 12) little to no contact from her, until 2008 when she needed help after her major heart attack. Her family (some are my fam too) have all but abandoned her, I am the only one who goes to hospital. She is very stubborn, refuses further rehab care and wants to go home. She thinks we (me and my siblings) are going to give her 24/7 home health care. And, we cannot. (or some of us will not be able to do that)
Tomorrow, I speak to the Social Worker about discharge planning.
Its a sad situation, one that she has brought upon herself, but no one in the family will help or even come to see her.
I need for her to go to further rehab so she can receive the help she needs, she's refusing. I feel like I need to remove myself for two weeks or so, so maybe she will start to co-operate with them? Just looking for advice. Thanks!

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I'm so sorry for your loss Shiloh. You were so wonderful to your birth mother. I hope you take comfort in that.
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ShilohSavin, Thank you so much for the update. So often we are left not knowing how things turn out. I appreciate you taking the time to tell us, amidst the upheaval in your life.

My condolences on the loss of your mother. I hope that you can be at peace.
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Sunny, sounds like you're answering the original post. You might have missed Shiloh's last post but her mother died a few days ago.

Shiloh, I am sorry for your loss, not just the death of your mother but more for the fact that she didn't or perhaps was unable to be a better mother to you and leave you with more positive memories over your entire life. Perhaps her last minute rehab rally was that final gift to you.
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Shiloh, I'm so sorry for your loss. Be at peace. You did all that you could, and then some.
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I'm not sure I understand why you would feel guilt about your birth mother going to a place where her needs can be attended to. She has extensive medical and mental issues. Apparently the professionals see this and have made their recommendations.

From the background you describe, I would not even consider providing care for her in your home. I'm trying to understand the dynamics in these types of situations. Apparently, there is something that was wrong years ago and you are trying to fix it.

It's good you are posting here. There is so much support for those who are trying their best to provide care for their loved ones. It's touching that you care so deeply about her.
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Hi Everyone - just wanted to give an update. My Mother moved to a Skilled Nursing Facility on 9/11/15 and was doing great, had changed her attitude and was working with Physical Therapy. Unfortunately, she passed away in her sleep on Saturday Morning around 6 AM. They said they went in to give her a blood glucose test at 6AM and found her unresponsive and slumped over to the left side. They performed CPR and attempted to revive but they were unsuccessful.

It's been a rough year and week and I appreciate all of your wisdom and help via Online. It's been so great to be able to have some feedback and get some validation about the things I was going through with my Mother.
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Fantastic!
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So, so glad!
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Update: She has agreed to further Rehab Therapy at a sub acute rehab facility, just awaiting Insurance approval so she can be transferred. Very pleased that she made a good decision for herself. :)
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Stop and take a deep breath. OK, now let's talk. Everyone wants to help those who help themselves. Birth mother isn't helping herself. She is going against good judgment and doctor's orders by going home. You and the case managers all know it's wrong. I wouldn't put a lot of stock in what she is telling you over the phone. You don't know what was really said by the case manager. Mom isn't making good decisions at this time. With her mental illness, she may never. I'm begging you Shiloh, don't commit yourself to taking care of her. It's too much for anyone to take on. Let her know that you will help her find a rehab or long term care facility, but other than that, you can't help her. Then prepare yourself for the guilt trip. Be firm! You can't do this! Stand strong. Also find out what was really said in her conversation with the case manager. Good luck to you and let us know how this turns our. We care about you.
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