As someone else noted, you have posted another question which indicates your brother is on your mother's accounts and is named POA. So, which is it?
As to the question posed here:
My YB and I were both added to our mother's primary account many years ago. Neither of us monitored or did anything with that. Later we were also named POAs. When the need for POA happened (dementia), I was the one who took the reins and managed her finances. Did I go willy nilly spending her money on myself? Hell no. I kept very tight control over the accounts (had to set up SS Rep Payee and a trust fund), and with the exception of paying for my gas a few times, all funds were used for her benefit (facility, any med/dent payments, supplies like briefs and wipes, a few "treats" for her, etc. The gas payments were only a few times and didn't nearly cover all the gas I used in the 1.75 YEARS I made multiple trips/week to her condo to clear, clean and get repairs done so we could sell it. Other than those few times, nope.
The account was hers and hers alone. The only advantage to having our names on the account would be 1) to allow us to manage her finances should she be unable to and we had no POA and 2) the remaining funds, if any, becomes ours automatically, no need for probate, as we are considered owners of the account.
There IS a danger in making someone joint on an account, as in fact they ARE joint owner. Caution must be used to only do this if you fully trust that person. The same can be said for appointing someone as your POA. They also can abuse this "power" and do significant damage, although they could leave themselves open to legal ramifications. In both instances, only a person/people who are trusted should be added to accounts or appointed to POA.
The “still spend money on myself” part is frightening. When you see that lawyer ask about a care contract if you were “paying” yourself from moms bank account., even if mom gave you permission. if you don’t get this straight you are putting yourself in jeopardy of doing five hard years of caring after your mom needs more help than you can manage. Make sure the lawyer is qualified, well versed in your states medicaid law and be sure to explain in detail how you have managed your moms finances. Come back and let us know how it goes. Your experience can help others who read these posts.
Being a Fiduciary (which you are if you are her POA) makes you LEGALLY LIABLE under the law to understand what you are doing, and if your name is on your Mom's accounts and you are spending her money on yourself then you are already breaking the law. You need to get to a Lawyer at once (this CAN be paid for with your Mother's funds as you are her POA and you are getting information you require to serve in this way. As has been pointed out to you by some below, you could be comingling funds and things may looks like your mother is gifting, thus preventing her from getting Medicaid should she ever need it. Please get educated on this at once. It is crucial whether you are POA or not.
No, if the account is just Moms money. I hope you haven't co-mingled your money. Makes it real hard when Medicaid is involved. They consider every acct with Moms name on it hers. You have to prove differently.
POA means more than just paying Moms bills. It gives you the ability to place her when she can't make informed decisions. It gives you the ability to talk about her bills to creditors. Cash in CDs for her care. Talk with the bank concerning more than just her bank acct. You need to read what responsibilities she has given you. And, unless the POA is immediate, you can't do anything if she is not incompetent unless she asks. With me it was write out the checks for Mom, she signed them. Then her handwriting got so bad, then I signed the checks as joint owner.
I will assume you were put on Moms account in case something happened and you could pay her bills. This does not allow you to spend her money.
"It gives you the ability to place her when she can't make informed decisions."
It may enable you to sign all the paperwork involved in "placing" someone, but it doesn't give you the "power" to do so. When my mother refused to let the aides in (1hr/day with intent to increase and keep her in her home, lasted less than 2 months), we had to fall back to Plan B - facility. There was no way I could have cared for her in my home or hers, and neither brother would have been appropriate choices.
Despite AL being in her own plans before dementia took over, she absolutely refused to consider moving ANYWHERE, but esp not AL. The EC attorney told me we could NOT force her to move and suggested guardianship. Staff at MC also told me no one could force a resident to do or take anything they refused to do or take. Even with dementia, they have rights.
Since guardianship is expensive and takes time AND the facility chosen wouldn't accept a "committal", we had to punt. YB came up with a phony letter from 'Elder Services' that ticked her off to no end, but was enough to get her to "agree" to the move.
Bottom line: POAs allow us to "stand in" for the person, managing finances and making decisions as if we were that person, to the best of our ability. Same for medical POA - your decisions should be in line with what the person would have chosen. This does make it difficult sometimes. However POAs do NOT give us 100% sway over the person. That would be guardianship (depending on how the court sets it up, even that might not be 100%.)
I was all the things you mention for my dad, POA, joint holder on his banking, and executor of his will. There’s no conflict in doing all. I’m not sure what you mean by “spend money on myself”
As to the question posed here:
My YB and I were both added to our mother's primary account many years ago. Neither of us monitored or did anything with that. Later we were also named POAs. When the need for POA happened (dementia), I was the one who took the reins and managed her finances. Did I go willy nilly spending her money on myself? Hell no. I kept very tight control over the accounts (had to set up SS Rep Payee and a trust fund), and with the exception of paying for my gas a few times, all funds were used for her benefit (facility, any med/dent payments, supplies like briefs and wipes, a few "treats" for her, etc. The gas payments were only a few times and didn't nearly cover all the gas I used in the 1.75 YEARS I made multiple trips/week to her condo to clear, clean and get repairs done so we could sell it. Other than those few times, nope.
The account was hers and hers alone. The only advantage to having our names on the account would be 1) to allow us to manage her finances should she be unable to and we had no POA and 2) the remaining funds, if any, becomes ours automatically, no need for probate, as we are considered owners of the account.
There IS a danger in making someone joint on an account, as in fact they ARE joint owner. Caution must be used to only do this if you fully trust that person. The same can be said for appointing someone as your POA. They also can abuse this "power" and do significant damage, although they could leave themselves open to legal ramifications. In both instances, only a person/people who are trusted should be added to accounts or appointed to POA.
When you see that lawyer ask about a care contract if you were “paying” yourself from moms bank account., even if mom gave you permission.
if you don’t get this straight you are putting yourself in jeopardy of doing five hard years of caring after your mom needs more help than you can manage. Make sure the lawyer is qualified, well versed in your states medicaid law and be sure to explain in detail how you have managed your moms finances. Come back and let us know how it goes. Your experience can help others who read these posts.
You need to get to a Lawyer at once (this CAN be paid for with your Mother's funds as you are her POA and you are getting information you require to serve in this way. As has been pointed out to you by some below, you could be comingling funds and things may looks like your mother is gifting, thus preventing her from getting Medicaid should she ever need it.
Please get educated on this at once. It is crucial whether you are POA or not.
POA means more than just paying Moms bills. It gives you the ability to place her when she can't make informed decisions. It gives you the ability to talk about her bills to creditors. Cash in CDs for her care. Talk with the bank concerning more than just her bank acct. You need to read what responsibilities she has given you. And, unless the POA is immediate, you can't do anything if she is not incompetent unless she asks. With me it was write out the checks for Mom, she signed them. Then her handwriting got so bad, then I signed the checks as joint owner.
I will assume you were put on Moms account in case something happened and you could pay her bills. This does not allow you to spend her money.
It may enable you to sign all the paperwork involved in "placing" someone, but it doesn't give you the "power" to do so. When my mother refused to let the aides in (1hr/day with intent to increase and keep her in her home, lasted less than 2 months), we had to fall back to Plan B - facility. There was no way I could have cared for her in my home or hers, and neither brother would have been appropriate choices.
Despite AL being in her own plans before dementia took over, she absolutely refused to consider moving ANYWHERE, but esp not AL. The EC attorney told me we could NOT force her to move and suggested guardianship. Staff at MC also told me no one could force a resident to do or take anything they refused to do or take. Even with dementia, they have rights.
Since guardianship is expensive and takes time AND the facility chosen wouldn't accept a "committal", we had to punt. YB came up with a phony letter from 'Elder Services' that ticked her off to no end, but was enough to get her to "agree" to the move.
Bottom line: POAs allow us to "stand in" for the person, managing finances and making decisions as if we were that person, to the best of our ability. Same for medical POA - your decisions should be in line with what the person would have chosen. This does make it difficult sometimes. However POAs do NOT give us 100% sway over the person. That would be guardianship (depending on how the court sets it up, even that might not be 100%.)