My Mother is looking for respite care at a day care center for my Dad with dementia. Any advice? - AgingCare.com

My Mother is looking for respite care at a day care center for my Dad with dementia. Any advice?

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My parents live in Baldwin, NY. My dad is 91, and bored all day. He constantly asks if he can go to bed. He calls out to my mom in the middle of the night, so she rarely gets a full night's rest. I need a day care center where my mom can leave him for a few hours and get a break from him.

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My husband goes to one run by Easter Seals. You might want to check that out. Before he got Medicaid I paid for 4 hours twice a week which cost me $56.00. I took him there and picked him up but the center can help you if you need transportation. If your dad is reluctant to go; the strategy I used was I told him he was going to volunteer to help with some of the people there.
Now he looks forward to going and even asks if he can go on the weekend.
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Check your town's Council on Aging.
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I would contact my local Area Agency on Aging or the Visiting Nurse Assoc. Where I live, the visiting nurse organizations run Adult Day Cares. There are also some more costly private pay ADC.
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You can find a checklist for comparing adult day programs on the Family Caregiver Support pages of the Southern Maine Agency on Aging website (www.smaaa.org). Click on caregiver resources and scroll down.
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They have ratings from one star to 5 stars. I went with the highest rating on line. It was my only option that I knew of and then someone on line that I knew recommended it also. It turned out to be an excellent place.
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I went online and searched for dept of aging in my county, emailed them and they called me to set up an appointment for us in September. I was told it is a locked facility, they do activities etc. There is a bus to pick him up for 56,00 a day and 47.00 if we drive him The hours are 9am to 3pm Monday to Thursday I was asked if he still goes to bathroom by himself which he does and they said they would put him in the Senior Plus group. They have different care for different conditions They give medications etc if needed. My son will be having a tour of the facility (about20mins away) and my husband will be introduced to the others and join in with them in order to see his reaction etc. He is still very active raking, yard work etc. I am hoping we will be able to afford this and if he likes it, in order for us to get a break. I will follow up with results of our visit. So maybe you can research it too. Hope this was a little helpful, Good Luck to you
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